Changing Tides and Changing Minds
by BJG Pwns
Summary: Emma Zimmer was forced to move from Florida to Toronto due to the fact that her father put a knife to her throat. As Layla Smith, she runs into the stunning Elijah Goldsworthy. Not only is he different and breathtakingly gorgeous, but pining after Clare.
1. Chapter 1

**Author Note::**

**I'll probably be flamed for this, but I don't care. This is a Eli/OC story, if you don't like, don't read. This story it's a key story for me on fanficiton. Just something to do when I get bored, and I've been bored a lot lately. I have 'All Over Again' and 'This Maddening Game of Dancing' fictions too, but right now the main squeeze is 'All Over Again'.**

**I've neglected 'This Maddening Game of Dancing' and this story might end up the same too. :\ But I've got a lot more on my flash drive for this one than the other.**

**Also this is my first M story. This is because of the plot I have planned for it. I don't wanna give it away of course, but be cautioned. There won't be like heavy lemons or something crazy like that. But mostly just violence and other things of the sort. Just M to be safe, could be considered a high up T.**

**Enjoy.

* * *

**

"_Ms. Zimmer, it's probably best that you take Emma and move somewhere else."_

Outside the wind was blowing softly, making the leaves on the trees try to hold onto the branches tightly for dear life. The ones on the ground rustled together, sometimes billowing together and making a small tornado-like figure.

I was like those leaves.

Everything I had in Florida to hold onto was slipping away, because my father was the wind; pushing and pulling me away from everything I love.

I grunted in a harsh sarcastic laugh.

"_We have reason to believe that someone bailed him out of jail. There isn't much we can do there, but we can relocate you and your daughter elsewhere until the trial."_

I yanked another sweater off of the hanger on my closet. It was black and had an odd graphic on the from in red and white. It was Stephen's. My boyfriend. I smiled softly at the thought. How'd I miss him the most. Sure I had friends, and sure they were there for me when I didn't want to go home because of the fighting; but I could always rely on Stephen.

We only had been dating for a month, and I was already starting to feel something more than like for him.

Something closed over my heart and tightened, making me loose my breath and small tears spring to my eyes.

Because I was leaving him.

"_The trial isn't for another two months, but we think it's for Emma's best interest, and your own, that you both leave now."_

I have to say bye to him at least.

Everything happened so fast in the past two days I'm not really sure if there was some possible reason to where as he would have known what happened.

What happened.

My mother, Sharon, and my father started to fight a lot. He lost his job and everything went to shit because he was to depressed to find another. So alcohol became his best friend, and he became my drunk father.

Before he'd scream at her for being a 'bitch' for not looking for a job. That it was 'her fault' that he lost his.

But all in all it was pretty much no ones fault. The company lost everything because of the economy.

He didn't see it that way though.

And my mom can't see out of her left eye after he hit her last week.

I thought it was an accident. Because she told me it was an accident.

But I know it wasn't an accident when he grabbed a knife and put it against my throat. Because 'I was a whore that was sleeping with all the guys, disgracing him, and he'd slit my throat if I was pregnant'. My struggle to escape his grasp caused the knife to cut into my throat, and enough blood to make me panic.

"_We'll take care of everything. Just until you can start to stand on your own feet."_

I already put most of my clothes away, and I really shouldn't be outside right now. But I wanted to see him. Stephen.

Thankfully he was only a few houses down from mine.

I tightened my scarf around my neck, smiling because it smelt like him; it _was_ his.

His porch was in my view, so I jogged the rest of the way. Once I made it to the steps, I looked through the living room picture window to even see if he was home. If there was any place he'd be in the house it'd be in the living room; because it was his room. He lives in a two bedroom house with his parents and little sister—so he was nice enough to give up his room when she was born a few years ago.

My heart sunk into the pit of my stomach.

On the couch was Stephen—trusting into my friend Catherine.

I felt nothing after that.

I felt nothing as I walked home, wishing that I was just another leaf in that wind. Now I didn't care if I left. Now I wanted to leave. I always thought if something like this ever happened, that I'd cry and bawl my eyes out—my heart breaking into a million thousand pieces. I'd want to go in there and rip out his throat and scream and yell and cry like they did in every situation like this.

Instead I did what I never expected to do.

I tossed his scarf on the porch and started to walk away.

Fuck him, fuck her; fuck love.

Just fuck it all.

"_We're going to move you two out of the country. Don't be startled, it's going to be fine. We have already told the Canadian government of the situation and they are more than glad to help. The farther away from Florida, the better. You'll have to change your names of course for extra precaution."_

Degrassi, here I come.


	2. Chapter 2

_Step_, _splash, step, splash, step, step, step, SPLASH._

Damn it all to hell.

My teeth were chattering, and the rain was hitting me; more like pelting me.

First day of school as Layla Marie Smith, junior; at Degrassi. And I had to walk, walk in the pouring rain because neither my mother or I had applied for a Canadian license with our new names on them. Well I couldn't blame her either. We just pulled in the day before and threw what shit we had in the house and tried to find something to eat.

All I could blame was my father. Goddamn him all to hell, bastard.

A car passed by, causing the giant puddle of water to splash high above my head and drenching officially all of me.

It was a hearse.

Just flipping fantastic. Some creepy guy and a dead one just splashed me with water.

Goddamn it!

Another thing to add to the list of bad things that has happened to me in the last few days; I was late for my first class.

I entered the building, finding the halls empty. I sighed and made my way into the office.

Once I got my schedule and looked at the clock, my on coming headache got worse.

Scratch that. I was so late I completely missed my first class. Physics. Now I was on to Government, which I was still late to mind you.

"Ms. Smith," the tall man smiled. His salt pepper hair and wrinkles reminded me slightly of my grandfather. "How nice of you to join us."

I smiled softly, pulling some of the soaked hair behind my ear. "Sorry. I had to walk across town," I murmured.

"It's quite already, just take the seat in the back next to Ms. Coyne yes," he replied turning towards the board. Without trying to make a scene, I quickly walked to the back of the room, and sat in the empty seat next who I thought was this Ms. Coyne. She didn't spare me a glance, so I decided not to waste time dwelling on the fact that I probably wouldn't make friends.

The class passed in the quick thirty minutes I was there. I walked out as quickly as I could and on to the next class. It was trigonometry, math; the devil's addition as I would like to call it.

I got there pretty late apparently, because most of the room was full when I got there. The map that they gave didn't really help out all that much evidently. I walked to the back of the room, squeaking as I went because my sneakers were soaked.

The guy sitting next to me laughed, eying me up without trying to hide it. I felt the heat flush my cheeks immediately.

"What the hell happened to you," he laughed some more.

I hunched my shoulders and pretty much tried to curl into a ball I guess you could say. My head fell until it was resting completely in my arms. I looked through the cracks in my arm shield to see that he was actually not to bad looking. His hair wasn't exactly shaved, but you could tell that the way it was growing that it was at one point. It was brown and stood up like he gelled it up perfectly every day.

But he's an ass already.

We spent the forty-five minutes in class talking about the fundamentals of math. The more the short lady in the front talked about it; the more I hated it.

As the bell rang, I got up to move to the next class, but slipped because of my squeaky shoes. I was waiting for the moment where I'd crack my head on the floor.

Instead someone was catching me and steadying myself.

"Watch your step hot stuff," a familiar obnoxious voice whispered in my ear. Immediately I brought my elbow back, right into his ribs.

A soft groan and the release of my body lets me know that he's been hurt; and I smile softly to myself at the satisfaction.

Normally I'm not like this at all. I'm not a bitch and I'm actually a friendly person. But now, again, it's all my father's fault.

One more class and then I had lunch, which I would probably spend in the bathroom drying my clothes with the hand-drier because I couldn't care less about food at the moment.

French.

I was the first to the class, and happily squeaked to the back were I found a French-English dictionary and textbook. Along with two literature books written in French. Romeo and Juliet, and Huckleberry Finn. Two odd selections, but something I'm sure I'd read no problem.

Class started to fill up quickly, and I sighed, hoping against all hope that there wasn't a dirt bag in this class either.

"Excuse me, but that's kind of my seat."

I looked up, and almost gaped.

He was something else entirely.

I probably came up to his shoulder, and I was really short. So he was about five foot seven. His hair was black, and the natural color. I could tell because it didn't look dried out and fake like all the people that dyed their hair normally did. It was somewhat shiny and brushed a little bit.

His fingers were painted black, and covered in rings. A gray almost-black vest was over his black shirt, but hidden by his black jacket. His dark denim jeans were tight and hugged to every part of his legs.

Finally I looked up to his face and almost drooled right there.

He was far better looking than anyone I had ever seen in my life; and his jade eyes put me under some kind of spell. His pale skin that contrasted harshly against his hair and clothes made him kind of glow.

Normally I go for the tall cute normal guys that possibly play sports. Like Stephen or mystery ass hole from trigonometry.

But he was completely opposite of Stephen, and that's kind of what I wanted.

"I-I'm sorry," I stuttered out jumping up quickly and hopping to the seat next to the one I just left.

"It's no problem," he laughed, smirking slightly. I cried a bit on the inside. His lips were full and beckoning me it seemed. And hell; I wanted to be beckoned.

I could feel my blush coming again, so I quickly looked away.

Another old guy for a teacher. Well that's nice.

He started to talk, slowly trying to slip some French in his speech.

"Pst."

I glanced over from the corner of my eye to see Mr. Green eyes looking at me expectantly. I raised an eyebrow.

"You walked to school didn't you," he asked knowingly. I looked down at my soaking wet clothes, knowing that he was looking at them too. They weren't overly priced or a brand name; just some old stuff I found in Goodwill. Today I was sporting a pair of flared jeans and a shirt with holes and a graphic of Transformers on the front. All by the way was soaked. I ran a hand through my dark brown hair trying to shake it up some so I wouldn't look horrible when it dried. "Yeah," I sighed, "it's a long story, but I pretty much got soaked to the bone."

"If it's still raining after school," he smirked, "will you need a ride?"

I seriously felt my heart stop beating for a minute.

The bell ringing made me scream softly, jumping in my seat and falling out. Green eyes was over there in a matter of seconds helping me up. "Are you alright," he chuckled pulling me up to my full stature. Yeah, I came up to about his shoulder. I tried to smile,"Yeah, it's just... you know.. loud noises freak me out when I'm spaced out."

We walked out of the room together. "So about that ride," he asked.

I nodded trying not to blush while looking at his face.

"What's you're name?"

"It's... it's E-Layla. What's your's?"

He smirked again, starting to walk away backwards, "Elijah."


	3. Chapter 3

I ran to the bathroom because, (a) I was blushing furiously and wanted to get away so Elijah wouldn't see, and (b) well I was still wet.

Surprisingly the bathroom was near empty. Except for an Indian girl changing from slacks and a sweater to a skirt and a showy top. I shook my head and walked straight for the drier and pushed the button. The loud noise must have startled her, because she screamed much like I did not but five minutes ago. I started to run my shirt under the air, waiting for most of it to dry. There wasn't much I could do for my pants, so I flung my head under and started to run my fingers through the strands as it dried.

After four minutes of that, I was happy to say that it came out dry and wavy when I looked in the mirror.

The Indian girl was starring at me in almost horror.

"What happened? Why are you so... wet?"

I turned around to look at her. "I had to walk to school, and it was raining. No big deal," I smiled. She nodded picking up her bag.

"Do you have lunch right now," she asked.

I nodded in confusion.

"So do I. Why don't you sit with me and my friends?"

The lunch room was rather large and more exciting and new than my old one in Florida. It was packed with kids up the spout too.

I followed the girl to the back of the room, towards the middle of the table row. There was about six or seven kids there.

My eyes scanned over each one, to see if I had classes with them before hand.

I about shit myself when my eyes landed on Elijah.

"Ah, so she's dry I see," he smirked turning to face the table rather than the girl sitting next to him. A fraction of my heart fell just a little bit more into the pit of my stomach.

I took the open seat across from him, trying to play with the hem of my shirt and look everywhere but him.

"So Alli, who's your friend," the girl next to Elijah asked.

I looked to the girl, smiling softly to myself when her lips were moving and no words were leaving, searching for the memory that didn't exist where I told her my name. Elijah smirked, turning towards the rest of the table. "This is Layla."

He snapped his fingers in front of my face, his other hand pointing towards the guy sitting next to me. "That's Adam," next person, "that's Conner," the girl, "the wonderful Alli that brought you to us today." Again he pointed to the person at the end of his bench, "Dave," and he paused considerably at the girl next to him, and he actually turned towards her and smiled for the first time I saw him, "and this is Clare."

Yeah, my heart fell some more.

I visibly shook myself at that. No I can't like him. Not looking for a relationship. Friends. I need friends.

"Hey," I whispered, almost looking back down.

Clare sounded like a child of an angel, "You must be new here."

I nodded sheepishly.

She smiled, turning to Elijah in all seriousness. "Eli, don't go picking on her or I'm going to pinch you until you have cancer. Be nice."

They were defiantly dating.

Lunch passed by somewhat quickly. There were jokes said in which I couldn't _not_ laugh. I almost felt at home, like they were the friends that I left back in Florida. "What class do you have next," Dave asked. He was tanned, almost light skinned, not really bald; and he had a nice smile I guess.

I dug the schedule out of my back pocket, unfolding it and scanning to the fifth hour.

"Art," I mumbled. Elijah-Eli; whatever his name was, looked like a Artsy guy. Hopefully I'd have that with him.

"Clare and I have English 12 next," he almost read my mind. Wait—they are both _seniors_?

Alli pushed her way to me, where she grabbed me by the elbow with a smile. "I have Art next. Let's go together."

There were eight people in Art; not including Alli and myself. And during the forty-five minutes of just drawing, Alli and I talked. Well, more like Alli talked.

In the short period of time she told me about her whole life story.

She was going to be in an arranged marriage most likely in the next few years. Her older brother Sav was doing his own thing against his parents wishes and is going to Burkley with his girlfriend Ayna. Her best friend was Clare, the girl at lunch with Elijah. She likes to dance sometimes and eat whatever she wants. There is nothing more that she loves than gossip. Before she wanted to do yearbook, but it brought up to many bad memories with her ex-Johnny.

That's when she shut up.

"So... do you still like this Johnny," I asked, looking up from the drawing of a duck I had going.

She nodded, and I swear I heard a sniffle in there. "Y-yeah," she whispered, "I miss him a lot. I think I love him honestly."

I nodded too. "Tell me about him. Sometimes it helps; and who knows, you might even laugh."

She did laugh, and went into a even longer story of him.

They met on a Biology camp trip when she was a freshmen. He was a senior, but it didn't matter because she wanted him. He had long blond hair and always wore a hat with the attitude of a bad boy. Always reading though. She snuck into his tent and they played cards. Over the next couple days she told him how she felt and he started to push her away. But she kept going back like a fly to the light. Because under everything, he was a really sweet guy that ended up liking her back.

He broke up with her because she took some pictures of him when all his walls were down; when he was venerable like he was with her when they were being their-selves. She showed it to the yearbook team, and he saw. Then he sent out some... inappropriate pictures of herself to his best friend.

Every day after that day she'd cry when she saw him.

And cry she did.

"I-I'm sorry," she muttered, grabbing her shirt to wipe at her makeup.

I patted her back almost awkwardly, "Really it's okay. Do you feel better... talking about him?"

She nodded frantically, smiling. We laughed as the bell rang, and she actually hugged and thanked me when we left the classroom to go our separate ways.

There wasn't anyone else I knew in the rest of my classes of the day. Sadly.

I almost forgot about Elijah's offer until I got to the front doors, only to see it pouring harder than it was that morning. And he was no where in sight.

I sighed, just about to step off the stairs and into the rain when a car pulled up right in front of me.

Scratch that... a hearse.

The hearse.

I stood watching, waiting, for it to do something. Finally after about ten seconds, it honked it's horn. I raised an eyebrow.

The window rolled down, and Elijah's head popped out. The shock of it had my jaw dropping slightly. "Are you coming or what," he smirked.

I hurried past the front and over to the passenger side were I got in. He was the one that splashed me with water today, the reason why I was soaking to the bone. My eyes glared daggers at him.

"Yeah I know I practically drowned you today. I'm sorry. I was running late. This is me paying you back, eh?"

"You know," I started while he pulled out of the parking lot, "you could have made it up to me by _stopping _and picking me up to take me to school."

"I was late," he retaliated with confusion on his face.

"So was I."

The rest of the ride was silent. Minus the parts where he'd ask for directions and I'd feed him the answers.

When we turned on my road, I sat up just a bit more straighter. Dry clothes here I come.

"It's the house on the right, the blue one," I murmured looking out the window as he started to slow down.

He stopped just before my house turning to me, "You're shitting me right?"

"Um, no, why?"

He pointed to the red bricked house just to the right of my own. It was nice.

"That's _my_ house."

I looked back at him, then to the house, then to mine. Oh God. Is this a blessing or is this a curse.

"You—I-We-Wh-" I stuttered out furiously left and right.

"Welcome to the neighborhood—neighbor."

Damn that smirk.


	4. Chapter 4

A month flew by like nothing. It was already Halloween.

School had definitely been getting better. Alli and I were best friends now. Every other weekend she'd come over to my house and we'd gossip and watch movies. She was really awesome to hang out with and I liked that I could tell her just about anything. Well anything minus the giant ass crush that I had on Eli.

He actually drove me to school everyday, and drove me home every other day. It was great because I'd get to spend some one-on-one time with him. I loved it because he actually started to smile around me for once. Sure he'd smirk every once in a while, but he smiles more now. Sadly I'm always second place to_ her_.

Every minute I have to watch him practically drool over Clare, is just another minute that I wish I'd go blind.

The cute ass-hole in my Trigonometry class has a name; Mark. A couple days ago he asked me to go out on a date with him. I didn't get butterflies, tingles, goosebumps; nothing. Just the constant reminder that it wasn't _Eli_ asking me. But hell. I don't need a boyfriend at this point. So why even bother? I told Mark that I wasn't looking for a boyfriend, but he gave me his number anyways. It was kind of cute how he asked me for my phone number and when I said 'Nope' he blushed.

My mom is actually doing better. She got a job as a bartender and she's almost happy again. It's nice and all, but sooner or later—in a month—she'll have to go to the trial.

Right now I'm actually walking to Adam's house. His brother Drew was throwing a Halloween party. I was dressed up as a werewolf. Alli said she'd meet me there. She was going to be Alice from Alice in Wonderland. I didn't get the chance to talk to Eli today, so I wasn't sure if he was coming or not. If he did, I'm sure going to give him hell because he could have given me a ride.

Feet hitting the steps, I shivered at the cold. That and the house was seriously shaking because of the music.

Inside it was jam packed with kids. Most in costumes, and every once in a while I'd see one without a costume. But no where could I see my little Indian friend in a Alice costume. I walked around aimlessly for a while, running into a few people I knew from class in which I'd say 'hey' or 'nice costume'. Finally I spotted Alli talking to Adam, Clare, Drew, and Eli. Damn him.

I made my way over and tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around and hugged me quickly. "Omigod! Layla, you look so hot in that," she gushed.

Honestly, I was in a pair of shorts ripped around my lower thigh, a vest and white wife beater. All of it was covered in dirt, even fake blood here and there. I teased and ratted my hair and smoothed it out mostly before putting it into two pig tails. I had fangs on my lower and upper teeth. They weren't too big, because I could talk normally and no one could tell I had them in until I opened my mouth or smiled. I used a darker foundation to make my skin tanner before I added dirt on it.

"Thanks," I mumbled looking at my bare feet and hands; also really dirty.

"Ah, I see my enemy has arrived," Clare tried to sound serious but only ended up giggling.

She was right though. She was dressed as a vampire, but not the slutty kind. I gave her kudos in my head for that one. I hated to admit it, but she looked really pretty. Sighs.

Adam was a mummy. Drew was a football player—go figure. And Eli...

Was nothing. Why was he nothing?

"I thought you'd be the first to dress up," I said turning to him almost fully.

He smirked, "Nope, just human tonight. I couldn't decide what to be honestly."

"I told you you should have came vampire shopping with me," Clare sang in a sing song voice. Eli smiled; at _her_. I rolled my eyes briefly.

"Hey people!" Drew practically screamed. Of course I jumped high screaming myself. A hand rested itself on my shoulder, "Calm down puppy." Eli was laughing.

"Let's play 7 Minutes in Heaven, yeah, " Drew smiled turning towards the kitchen.

Let's _not_ play a middle school game; yeah?

Alli was already dragging me there, mumbling something about wanting to kiss Drew. God forbid. I staggered over next to here, where I plopped down on a stool, waiting for further instruction. Drew was grabbing a giant bowl off the cupboard and tossing it onto the counter. Paper and pens were being passed around. I turned to Alli, "What up with the paper?"

"Write your name on it. It'll be like a drawing."

"I thought you did 7 Minutes in Heaven like Spin the Bottle, you spin a bottle," I asked pushing away the paper and pen.

"No! This is so much more random."

"Totally not doing it," I sighed flipping my head onto my arms in a resting position.

Within the next five minutes, everyone that was playing had their name in the bowl and were waiting with smiles on their faces. I caught Eli's eye across the room, he was smirking again, pointing to Drew and winking.

He overheard me acting like Alli one day at lunch. She wouldn't shut up about Drew, so I was pretending to be her in mock and said "Drew I love you so much I just want to kiss you into bed," and Eli thinks I have been serious ever since. How could the bastard ever be so wrong?

"Adam and Samantha," Drew called out the two names. I watched as the Samantha girl practically run across the room to drag Adam into the kitchen pantry. Wow. I had to laugh for the hell of it with everyone else.

Alli was really undressing Drew with her eyes. I couldn't even talk to her once during the first round. I mean, she was biting her lip and smiling at him the whole time; it was quite disturbing.

Adam and Samantha came out seven minutes later, both flushed and holding triumphant smiles.

"Next is Kyle and Kelsey."

Another seven minutes flew by with borningness.

"Alli and... me," Drew smirked turning his gaze towards Alli.

My eyes widened considerably. What were the chances of that, really? Once the two love birds were out of site I walked towards the counter to look at the two tickets he held up.

'Alli and Wesley'.

I laughed loud and hard. So much that I think I almost cried. Eli came over with Clare, both looking at me with amused smiles. "Are you sad that your prince charming left with Backwoods," he laughed.

I wiped my eyes. Clare looked slightly uncomfortable, looking at her phone and back to us. "Hey guys I got to go, tell Adam I said sorry," she said hugging Eli for a moment... a long moment. I was waiting for them to kiss, looking out the corner of my eye, but it never happened. She hugged me briefly before leaving out the front door.

Drew stumbled out with Alli minutes later.

I couldn't help but smile for her though. She looked really happy, and that's all that matters right?

"Okay," Drew cleared his throat, smiling still, pulling out more papers. "Clare and... Eli." Now that's yet _another _one in a million chance.

"Goddamn it," Eli muttered clutching his head in his hands. I felt something vibrate in my chest. It kind of pissed me off, that he wanted her so bad. But hey, I was jealous. He's not mine.

"Clare just left,"I commented.

"Well," Drew mumbled pulling out another slip, "Eli and... Layla."

Eli's head snapped up, as well mine. "What the hell, I didn't even put my name in that damned bowl!"

As soon as the words left my lips, my eyes landed on Alli, whom was hiding behind Drew. My hand raised about to approach her and attack, but Eli grabbed my wrist, pulling me towards the closet. "I want to talk to you anyway," he whispered.

I followed, ignoring the jeers and snickers. Nothing is going to happen anyways, so I let everything relax in me.

Eli opened the door, motioning me to go in first. So I did, I went back as far as I could; which wasn't very far. Eli followed, shutting the door behind him and bumping into me in the dark. "Do you got your cell phone," I muttered, "it's pretty dark in here."

Next thing I know, Eli's cell phone illuminated the entire closet—and his face just mere inches from my own. I could feel, hear, and practically see my breath hitch. He was just so close...

"We're friends, right Layla," he asked, sensing my discomfort and taking a step back. I laughed, leaning against the shelves behind me.

"I'd like to think so, close friends actually. I don't let just anybody eat the pudding cups outta my fridge."

He smiled leaning against the door and setting his phone on the shelf to his right. "Well, what do you say I do if I like a girl, but she has a boyfriend?"

My ears started ringing with my own frantic heartbeat at the moment. Fast and harsh in my own chest, and the worst of it was I could hardly breath. "I thought you were dating Clare?"

A small smile graced his face, "No, no I'm not. She's dating K.C...and-"

"I get it," I sighed, "you like her, a lot."

He nodded silently, looking off at a can like he was embarrassed.

"Eli," I started, "You want things you can't have. So once Clare and K.C. break up, you won't feel like you like her anymore. And hey, maybe I'm wrong. But it doesn't matter. Don't chase after something that's not yours. You'll just end up getting hurt in the end."

I smiled weakly and took a step towards him.

"Besides," I sighed again, "I'd hate to see you two make kissy face in lunch; it'd drive me nuts. The way you look at her now, will be nothing compared to the way you'd look at her if you had her."

I kissed his cheek softly before side stepping him and opening the door. The first thing I noticed was that only a few people remained in the kitchen, everybody else had already left. I made my way through the house and out the door, trying hard _not_ to cry. Why cry?

_Because Eli finally confessed that he's not dating Clare, but pining after her more desperately. And you kinda told him the thought of them together made you puke. Practically telling him you're _jealous_ of her.__  
_

It was by far dark out now, and the streetlamps didn't do me much good.

I had a three or four block walk ahead of me, and I was kinda scared shitless. I heard the car coming before I saw the headlights bleeding into my vision from behind. Quickly I jumped into a nearby bush, watching as Eli's hearse drove by somewhat slowly, and him looking at his window as if searching.

After he passed, I got back out and started my journey again. It was long and annoying point blank.

Another car was coming. I didn't really care to jump into the bushes again, because the first time I jabbed my elbow right into a rock.

I should have though.

This car was slowly creeping up next to me, their window down and an arm shot out. Trying to ignore it, I walked slightly faster. The car kept up with me.

"What's a girl like you doing out on Halloween night walking by herself?"

I couldn't help but look over to tell the guy to shut the hell up, but was shocked to see Mark.

The feeling was mutual evidently, because his eyes grew slightly before a smile formed on his face and he stopped the car.

"Layla, what are you doing this fine evening," he smirked opening the door and stepping out of the car. I wiped my eyes of their moisture quickly, "Going home, I was just at a party."

His hand touched my shoulder, following my arm down to my hand. "Yeah? You look hot."

I wanted to roll my eyes, but refrained myself from doing so. "Thanks," I murmured with a slight lisp.

"Do you want a ride home," he offered, dropping the huskiness in his voice that he always had when talking to me. I looked down the road, then at his car, and back to him. Shaking my head I took a step back, "No it's fine. Thanks though. I can walk."

I would _love_ a ride home. But right now, I just wanted to mope mostly; alone.

"No really," he took a step closer grabbing my arm, "it's Halloween and you're walking home alone in the dark. That's dangerous. Just let me give you a ride. I won't be inappropriate, I promise."

Before I could object, or even _agree_ to his reasons, he was pulling me into the car and pulling the seat belt around me. It was kinda nice, maybe even sweet, but I didn't really acknowledge it. Mark turned back in his seat to put his seat belt on, and then turned his head to me. "So where do you live," he smiled.

"On Pine street a few blocks down," I stated before looking out the window and onto the street. Mark drove like 20 MPH for a few feet before turning left.

"You didn't have to turn," I turned to look at him, slightly panicked. Would he take me somewhere else or something?

"Well I'm hungry, are you hungry," he asked taking another turn.

"No, I'm just tired and I want to go home." Yeah, at home I can look out my window and through Eli's. I felt my eyes watering again. Damn it.

Mark looked at me, then back to the road—and me again. We pulled into a small cafe, that was still surprisingly open, and surprisingly empty. "Here, just let me get you something to eat, and then I'll get you home. I promise," he started to unbuckle my seat belt. Whatever, free food right?

We walked in and sat down in a booth. Mark ordered a order of fries and told me to get whatever I wanted. I looked over a lot of the menu, and finally saw large hot chocolate with whipped cream and cinnamon. Something I would die for.

"Mark! Can I get the deluxe hot coco," I almost begged looking at him with wide eyes.

He laughed. And I think I almost melted a little.

Yeah he's the typical guy I'd date. But his smile was just something to make me swoon. All his teeth were white and straight, and only a corner of his mouth would turn upwards, both dimples pulsing out and showing clear as day.

I couldn't help but smile myself.

He ate his fries and I drank my hot coco loving the feeling of the hot thick liquid flowing down my throat. Chocolatey goodness.

"Ready to go now," he asked, holding his hand out for me to take evidently.

I grabbed it, and let him pull me out of the booth and to the car after he paid.

Silence took over again until we were close to my house, in which I had to tell him which one it was and which driveway.

Once coming to a stop I unbuckled my seat belt and started to open the door, when I heard Mark kill the engine. I turned to look at him only to find him starring at me with a small smile. "What," I asked raising an eyebrow, pulling my second leg back in.

"Can I come in," he asked, completely polite, small puppy dog eyes in place.

Should I let him in?

I stole a glance at Eli's house. His porch light and living room lights were off, only a small bed light lamp illuminating his room from what I could see. He could be home, but I can't be so sure until I get up into my room and look out my window that faces his. Why did he even matter what Eli would think? He likes Clare.

And just maybe I like Mark.


	5. Chapter 5

"Umm, yeah I honestly don't see why not," I smiled climbing out of the car fully and starting towards the door. Mark was only a few steps behind me, and closed the door only seconds after I opened it after going inside. I turned on the living room light and ventured over to the couch. The clock on the wall told me it was a quarter towards midnight.

Mark sat next to me on the _very_ large couch and laid a hand on the back. "So," I laughed softly, "why did you want to come in."

He smirked, for the second or third time since I've been here in Canada. "It's all part of my master plan to get you to be my girl."

_His girl._

I kind of liked it.

"Yeah? How are you going to go about that in the next... fifteen or so minutes before you have to leave," I smiled.

His arm came around my shoulders, the hand playing with the vest that I had on, the other hand inching it's way over towards mine. "How about you show me your room?"

I just had to laugh, because the look of pure confusion was on his face when he said it. "I hope you know," I snorted, "that if I do show you my room, all clothes will stay on, and there will be no groping."

Another smile made it's way on his face, "I wouldn't have it any other way."

Once up the stairs it was a short two-three step walk to my room, in which I opened for the both of us.

It wasn't anything special.

I the corner was my full bed, thick and soft light green sheets and comforter. To the side of it was my nightstand in which I kept everything. My laptop, charger, phone, notebooks, books, and even some snacks and water when I wake up in the middle of the night.

Off on the other side of the room was my dresser full of jeans and shirts, and the closet next to it full of shirts and tops. Shoes in the bottom, ect., ect.

My room was a light baby blue, the way it was when I came. I didn't care to change it really.

At the end of my bed was the window, the window that was not but three yards across from the one in Eli's room.

The switch was next to my bed, only God knows why, so I left Mark at the door while I walked over and shut the somewhat thin curtains before turning on the light.

Mark's eyes were trying to readjust to the light, also trying to find me. "What's your next move," I smiled, standing by the window in wait. He made his way over quickly before standing in front of the window and me. "I'll get my goodnight kiss maybe?" He smiled, running a hand through his stoic hair.

Now or never right?

I stood on my tip toes so I could press my lips against his.

They were surprisingly soft, and not gaping open with a tongue sticking out and trying to shove it's way down my throat. I was also surprised that he wasn't running his hands all over me. One was resting on my shoulder and the other was in the both of mine dangling between us. No butterflies, no goosebumps; nothing.

I'm not really using him am I?

No... I just don't like him all that much. I like him, but not a lot.

Mark broke the kiss, laughing softly against my lips. I smiled softly. Maybe he's not a complete ass like I thought.

I let go of his hand to put mine on his chest, feeling a regular heartbeat underneath his shirt.

A hot large hand cupped my jaw, bringing my lips back to his again.

And just like that we were kissing, soft and slowly at first, and then it started to get heated, fast and it was a good feeling. No by all means did I like it, but it was a good feeling.

To feel wanted.

* * *

Mark agreed to make our little 'relationship' a secret for the most part.

It was actually his idea, and I full heartily agreed. I didn't want Alli saying anything, because I think she knew I had a crush on Eli, even though I didn't out right say it. She would hound me every waking moment of the day if she connected all the dots.

It's been a week, and things were going great to say in the least. I was somewhat happy.

I think the main reason I was actually happy was that I finally had proof that Eli didn't want me back. It was somewhat easier to move on. It wasn't moving on with Mark though. I couldn't bring myself to want Mark back like I wanted Eli at first. As I've said before though; it's nice to feel wanted.

But something possibly even better has happened.

Eli and I have become better friends.

After school everyday I still get rides home, and he always comes over to help me with my work. I swear, English will be the death of me. But it was kind of cute, because I'd turn around and help him with his French. So a nice rhythm was set. We talked about anything and everything. From school, to life; to Clare.

That's was probably one of the worst parts. Clare.

He'd tell me everything about her, and why he liked her and even how sometimes he'd just wish to punch K.C. In the face. But I could never leave my input, because he'd get mad and storm away.

So today, I'll shut up and just pat his back like he wants me to—because that's what friends are for, right?

"So how about we go to _your_ house today Mr. Goldsworthy," I commented while looking outside Morty's passenger window. I was waiting for the snort, the chuckle, or even the grunt that would tell me he totally opposes to the idea.

It never came.

"Okay." Simply said.

We pulled into his driveway like always, I tucked my coat around myself like always. It was getting colder, I could smell the crisp snow in the air. It doesn't make sense, but it's like smelling the cold. If were ever smellable. Sadly there wasn't any snow on the ground. Something I was looking forward to since moving somewhere that actually snowed.

I followed silently behind Eli as we walked up the stoop and waiting while he unlocked the door.

It was the same going through the somewhat dark and empty house. Eli's family didn't have much in the kitchen. Small sink, small counter, small fridge; but a lot of fast food wrappers in the trash can and littering here and there through the small room. In the living room there was a love seat and a small TV. Nothing special. No pictures or stands or anything. Very clean, very very clean.

There wasn't much more for me to inspect as I followed him up the stairs and down the tiny hallway. He stopped abruptly in front of me, and I stumbled a bit into him. He smirked, leaning against a closed door. "Are you ready to see the room you'll fantasize about for the rest of your life?"

I laughed, mirroring his stance on the wall just a step behind me. "Yeah? What's that supposed to mean Goldielocks?"

"Oh," he smirked even more if possible, "you know, because you're in love with me and all."

It almost plucked a string on my heart. It almost made my smile fall and me completely turn red at the truth. But almost.

Because now, I just smiled sadly and remember how it was like to feel that way. About Stephen, about past crushes; about him. "You wish E. You wish," I sighed standing up straighter and motioning him to open the door.

He rolled his eyes and smiled for once, opening the door without turning around with a click.

I pushed him aside with a giggle and stormed into his room to take in the amazingness of it all.

Eli was so so right.

I would fantasize about this room.

On the one corner, was the dresser, and the closet next to it. It was open and shirts were billowing out of the bottom of it and peaking out to me. There were clothes covering the floor here and there; pants, shirts, vests, jackets, socks, and even a pair of boxers or two. Band posters and CD's were laying everywhere. From 'First to Last' to 'A Static Lullaby' and even 'Alesana.'

I was surprised to see that the posters were on the floor, and on the walls were music sheets and lined pieces of paper with writing on them.

On the other corner was a desk with a laptop and cooling station neatly sitting with a wireless mouse. More paper from blank, lined, and music sheets lined a mess with pens and pencils.

A guitar was setting on a stand right next to the desk, a few guitar picks laying around it aimlessly.

The bed was half assed backwards with the headboard next to the window and the end up against the wall. The blanket was a mess with the sheets. The sheets were black and looked satin.

I walked over to the window, with a small smile on my face, and saw my own window looking back at me. The curtains were open and I could see my own new band poster of 'Ice Nine Kills' smiling back at me.

"Ah, I see Ms. Layla has opened her room to the world for once. No more silhouettes I see? And what is this? A band poster," he started to talk from behind me. I looked over my shoulder weakly to see him.

"Yeah, 'Ice Nine Kills'."

"Never heard of them," he mumbled, squinting. "I'll have to look 'em up."

I nodded, rounding on him only to flop on his bed with another giggle.

He shook his head with a smile, walking over to his computer and bringing it over to sit on his bed with it in his lap.

He crawled to the corner where the two walls met to lean against it and prop his computer on his knees while he typed furiously. Next thing I know, he's handing it off to me.

"Show me some of their songs," he leaned back against the wall.

I started to bring up their website, looking for the online music player. Their 'The Simple Act of Giving Up' song started to play. I minimized the browser, and was met with another heart constricting sight.

Eli's background was four pictures that made a square. It was like one of those photo booth tickets you get.

The first was Eli, a young Eli. Maybe fourteen or fifteen to his now eighteen. This one had shorter hair, a shaggy just over the eyes kind of hair. Still black, and no eyeliner like he did now. His shirt wasn't black, but a dark brown. The only way I was sure it was him was his jade green eyes. But here they looked so much brighter, like they saw all the happiness in the world. And his arm was around a girl. One that had long blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. Both smiling widely at the camera.

The next three were somewhat the same.

One goofy.

One cuddling.

...one kissing...

His hands snapped the laptop back. The song reaching it's intro.

"Who's she," I whispered.

Once I looked up, I almost regretted even coming over.

The look of pure tragedy was in his features.

Suddenly Eli looked like a man. One that had seen many horrors and wiser than all his elders. Just his eyes told me this. The now darker jade compared to the like sea green that I had just saw.

"Julia."

I leaned against his headboard, resting my eyes for a millisecond before opening them again. "Who's Julia?"

"She...she was my...girlfriend."

"What happened?" The words left my mouth like a soft murmur, almost not reaching my own ears.

Eli swallowed hard for a moment, looking away, then back to me for a second. "She was in an accident."

That's when I learned I was never really met Elijah Goldsworthy.

That's when I learned the truth that I had never thought imaginable.

Julia was his girlfriend of a year. Things were great, they were great, and everything was just great. Until the fateful day that Eli and her took the relationship to the next level. Then for another three months things were even better. He honestly believed he found the right girl for the rest of his life. Until he found a pair of boxers that weren't his own under her bed.

She broke down crying, saying over and over again that she was sorry. That it meant nothing and it was before they fell even more in love. That it was months ago. Three months ago; a day before they did just the same act of 'love'.

So he left, in the thunderstorm that was considered one of the worst in history for Toronto. Nothing made sense, life didn't make sense; love didn't make sense.

Of course she followed him. Followed after him and his car.

But it wasn't until he was drenched and in front of the park, that he heard the honk of a car.

It wasn't until he watched as a car t-boned her own on the drivers side.

He watched the life leave her eyes.

"Clare reminds you of her doesn't she," I whispered again, trying to process all the information and watch his face slowly start to crumble.

He looked me straight in the eye for the first time since starting the story. "Yeah, she does."

"Eli that's—" I started, but he cut me off.

"I know it's not right, I know it's sick and stupid. But that's the point. Why do I deserve to be happy? I practically killed her. So I want things I can't have; it only makes things easier for me Layla."

"Emma," I muttered harshly. I couldn't take it any more. Eli just shoved his skeletons out of the closet, and I wanted him to know that I trusted him just as much. "My name is Emma."

Confusion crossed his face momentarily before I continued.

"I... I lived in Florida. And-and my dad beat the shit out of my mom."

Deep breath... "She was going to leave him after it anyway," I continued, but looked him in the eye as I finished. "But we didn't turn to the cops until he put a knife to my throat."

Almost immediately his eyes flickered to my neck, were the scar could be seen. By no means was it tiny, but no one really noticed it until they starred.

"My real name is Emma Lee Zimmer. And you're the only one that knows beside my mother."

He looked almost angry the next moment. "What is this," he spat, " are you trying to beat me in a 'Who's life is the worst' contest or something?"

I felt my eyes water. There goes to show who you can and can't trust.

I got up quickly, willing the tears not to spill over my eyes. I guess I wasn't really over him, because that just stung worse than hearing about Julia.

"No," I trembled as I opened the door to his room, "it was just to show you that I trust you, because I thought you trusted me by telling me about Julia; but I guess I was wrong. You just want to shut everyone out and feel like a stupid git."


	6. Chapter 6

It's been two weeks since I stormed out of Eli's room and into my own. It really hurt, how he spilled his secret, and I mistook it as him trusting me. No, it was just him wanting to talk to someone, anyone that would listen. You'd think he'd go straight to Clare, but no. If he did that she'd piece together the story just like I did and reject him right out. Who wants to be a fill in for someone else? A replacement?

It's been a week and a half since Mark started to drive me home. I don't really talk about my personal life with him, and neither does he with me. So far we have just gone out to movies, the mall, hangout, make out, and just being in each others company. Why ruin such a good thing by pulling out the personal stuff? He threatened it when he noticed that I was upset. At lunch I sat with Alli in the art room. And after school I watched the hearse drive off with Clare in the front seat. _My_ seat. But it only got worse when Mark asked what happened, why I was sad, and what he could do to help. I was touched, why couldn't Eli be nice like that?

It's been a week since I saw Clare walk from the hearse to his door; then to the window in his room. I tried not to watch them, because that's just plain weird. But I couldn't fight the urge to know. To see what happened. She was crying. K.C. broke up with her for some Jenna girl. Alli had filled me in the next day. I watched through my curtain while he cradled her in his arms. There was no pleased smile, no look of horror on his face. Just a blank confused stare.

It's been five days since Clare left Eli's house with a smile. I missed that moment. The moment in his room where she kissed him, and evidently he kissed her back. It was the next day I heard the information second hand from Alli, again. Thank God for that gossiping girl. That was an apathetic day though. Mark also asked what was wrong that day, and again I smiled and told him nothing. Kissing him just to distract him and myself from my own problems. I was starting to force those kisses.

It's been three days since I watched from my room that Eli started to pace in front of Clare. Deep in thought, turning towards here every once in again to say something. Mark came over, and we spent time in my room watching a movie and making out. I was starting to become sick with myself then. That I had to actually talk myself into kissing him, to actually pretend it was Eli just to kiss him. I had to stop this. Because it wasn't fair to Mark. Day by day he started to show an interest of something more. Of a committed relationship that I couldn't give him.

It's been two days since Alli told me that Clare and Eli decided to remain friends. That they weren't going to become a thing. Mark asked me if we could stop sneaking around so he could meet my mom. I lied to him and said that she doesn't approve of me dating. God, I don't even know who I am anymore.

It's been a day since I glanced out my window to see Eli staring right at mine. A chair was propped right in front of it, guitar in hand, absentmindedly strumming and starring. Once he noticed that I actually saw him, he moved as if to open the window. I walked towards mine and shut the curtains. Mark was coming over later anyways. He didn't need to know that my freakish jerk of a neighbor starred at my window just like I starred at his.

It's been eight hours since I got in the car with my mom after school and saw Eli waiting next to his hearse. The moment I walked out of the school, my eyes were drawn to him. He took a step away from the car, and towards me, then motioning his thumb over his shoulder with his smirk. Like nothing was wrong and that taking a ride with him was an everyday occurrence. I didn't spare him another glance while I got into the car with mom. "Em," she looked in the rear view mirror, "isn't that your friend; the neighbor?" I grunted, looking out the side mirror to see him approaching my door. "Just drive mom, now." We left, and I saw more confusion twist his features while we drove away. And I felt myself becoming confused too.

It's been four hours since Eli has been throwing pop corn kernels at my window. At first I thought it was a bird or something, but I was terribly surprised to see him in his chair, window open, leaned back, and throwing the little yellow devils like it was something to do while bored. I rolled my eyes. Was this some game to him?

It's been two hours since my phone vibrated. Eli texted me, _'Will you please talk to me?'_ I didn't respond. Was there really even a need to? After a few seconds it vibrated again. _'I know you're reading my texts.'_ Suddenly I smiled at that. Of course he knew I was reading his texts.

It's been an hour since he said my name. Well, typed it. At first he was just texting me random things about his day, what he hates about French or why he was mad at Adam. Then it turned into him telling me everything. About what happened with Clare and how he thought he'd be happy that _she _kissed _him._ Turned out he was mad at himself for _not_ being happy about the kiss. Then he thought back to what I said, about how he just wanted something he couldn't have. He had done accepted that he thought he got a chance to be happy. That he didn't deserve it, but he should get a chance. Yet once he granted himself that little chance, he didn't want Clare. It wasn't about wanting what he couldn't have anymore. He just didn't want to be reminded of Julia. Then he sent it.

_'I know you're reading. I know you want to write back. So just do it, better yet, just come over. I'm dying to talk to you Emma.' _

It's been thirty minutes since I decided to reply. I told him that he was full of himself, saying that I wanted to write back. I heard the laugh from his window when he read it. Moments later he replied, '_So come over, please?'_

It's been about ten seconds since I heard my front door slam.

"I know you're up in your room," his voice called out from the bottom of my stairs, "and if you're naked, freeze until I get up there."

Was he...flirting? I laughed running towards my door to slam it shut. "You don't deserve to see my amazing nakedness Goldsworthy," I sung placing my back against the door. I could feel him rest his forehead on the other side.

"I'm sorry Emma," he whispered, and I had just barely heard it.

"You should be," I muttered.

"I like it much better than Layla," he said, "much more pretty." I laughed, since when do guys say 'pretty'?

I opened the door, watching as he was somewhat stunned. He walked in and held out his hand, as if I were supposed to shake it. I stuck my own out too after a moment, taking his and shaking. "Emma Lee Zimmer," I smiled.

"Elijah Israel Goldsworthy," he responded.

So I just stared smiling, because I didn't feel like I hated him anymore. He realized his ignorance and fixed his mistake. No questions asked. He didn't even have to say sorry, I just knew he was.

Hand still in mine, he yanked me to him, where he hugged me tightly. "I've missed you. So much."

I hugged him back to, giggling softly. I've missed him to, so much also.

"Can I call you Emma Lee," he asked, once we pulled away. I smiled walking over to flop on my bed.

"As long as you don't say it around people, only you, my mom, and I can know. Got it?"

He laughed coming to sit next to me. "Got it Captain."

"But if you make it sound like you're calling me _Emily_. No deal. I hate that name, they sound like whiney whores. _Emily's," _I 'pst' and laughed.

His arm slid across my shoulder, both of us laughing.

I had my friend back. I had Eli back.


	7. Chapter 7

Things had been going great between Eli and I, Mark and I.

I had officially told myself the moment that Eli set foot in my room the day we made up, that he was off limits. So I stopped pinning after him. Okay-I _tried_ to stop thinking about him, stop starring into his window.

Mark and I lapsed back into our secret not caring about anything else rather than hanging out and making out relationship. Not on a every other day occurrence now, it's a every weekend thing; which we both decided on full heartily. But he does drive me home every day when he can.

Eli gave me rides when Mark couldn't. He wanted to give me a ride all the time. Which made sense because he's my neighbor, but whatever. I told him that my Mom was always picking me up, because she freaked out if it was a teen driver. Which isn't true at all. Mom thought it was great that Eli was giving me rides home when Mark couldn't. As far as she knew though, Mark is Ali giving me a ride home when Eli couldn't. I'm a liar, what can I say?

Deep down I didn't really want to tell Eli about Mark, because for some reason or another I thought he'd freak out over it. I mean this guy named Riley was talking to me. Simply asking if I knew anyone named Zane and if I had seen him. Well somewhere along me saying 'No I don't know who he is, what does he look like?' I slipped on spilled juice on the cafeteria floor, and Riley's arms shot out to catch me. Even after regaining my balance and taking a good four steps towards my table, his arm was still around my shoulders.

Eli, well I guess he watched the whole thing from the table like everyone else. And when Riley left in search for Zane, he attacked like a hound.

"Who's he?"

"Riley somethin'," I shrugged digging into my cheese fries with a spoon.

"Are you two together," he countered, looking confused to why he even asked it.

I laughed, clutching my stomach. "Really? Because I just met that guy like two minutes ago. Never seen him in my life. He was looking for someone named Zane. "

"Well the guy had his arm around you," Dave commented smirking.

Alli rolled her eyes and smiled at me. "Obviously she slipped on the juice you spilled not but ten minutes ago."

I glared at him, "That was _your_ juice? Do you know the trauma I went through?"

We were all laughing, except for Eli. I poked him in the nose with my spoon, "What's up your butt sour puss? That was a funny joke, you _laugh_ at funny jokes. Try it. Ha ha!"

He smiled for a second, then looked me dead in the eye, "You'd tell us if you were dating someone wouldn't you?"

Another lie seems to be in order.

"If it was like mega serious, of course," I sighed, trying not to break eye contact. It wasn't a complete lie, right? Mark and I weren't serious. My eyes scanned the cafeteria, hoping to get a glance at him. But like always he wasn't there, because he didn't come to lunch. He goes out to the ravine with his friends, who I've never met.

I felt really bad about lying to Eli and our other friends, especially Alli.

It was still nice though, because an hour after school or something like that Eli would come over and we'd work on homework in my room like old times. After working on homework we'd usually play Halo or watch Fringe that I got on DVD, or watch random movies. Some days when I got bored of my house I'd suggest we go to his, and we would, but there wasn't much to do except watch whatever was on the TV.

It'd usually go on until nine or ten, and he'd go home or I'd go home.

Each day for two weeks, something small would change. Like instead of one of us sitting on the floor and the other on the bed, he started to sit with me where ever I sat. Or day by day when we'd watch a movie with the lights off after dark he'd gradually sit closer and closer until we were side to side. Then one day he started the tickling. When he wanted to win a petty argument he'd tickle me until I was in tears and begging for him to stop. And then he started to hug me every time before he left or I left.

Then, he started to flirt.

Small comments every once in a while that were somewhat perverted, or he'd compliment me smirking, just something tiny. Something I wouldn't normally notice if it was anyone else. Maybe I was just overreacting. Over analyzing everything because I had a giant ass crush on him. Still have a dormant giant ass crush.

Then it all went spiraling down.

Today it did I mean. Mark told me he couldn't give me a ride home because he had to run an errand. So I kissed him on the cheek and said okay. But when I was walking away he said that we needed to talk. I sighed, he was going to break off our fling.

"Okay, when," I asked turning around to lean up again the wall. We were outside by the dumpsters, and honestly I wanted to hurry if I was going to catch a ride with Eli. That and I didn't want Mark to know about mine and Eli's friendship. It felt like I was cheating on him or something, and I felt immensely guilty.

"How about this weekend, we can go to the ravine and talk," he nodded. I nodded to, turning and waving as I went. "Bye Mark," I murmured.

Eli was leaning up against the hearse, like he mentally knew I needed a ride. I smiled, jogging over to him and hugged him. "You're my savior. Mom couldn't come get me," I giggled pulling away from the hug. His arms were still around my waist and I put my hands on his chest as if to push myself off.

"We're going to my place today," he said finally letting go. I was momentarily shocked. He always let me decide where to go. Usually it didn't matter. Shake it off, it's nothing big. He probably got a new TV channel or something stupid like that.

I got into the passenger seat, glancing over to him. The curiosity was eating away at me. "So why do you get to decide where we go now, hm," I asked when we pulled out of the school parking lot. He looked over and smiled shaking his head.

"Because I actually picked up my room, and I got a movie I want to watch. That and were going to order out, my treat," he smugly said looking towards the road again.

"And why couldn't we do this at my house? I've only been to your house like three times," I laughed.

"Well I didn't exactly feel humble if I buy you food, and not your mom," he laughed, "I mean I love the woman, but I'm a cheap loser."

When we pulled into his driveway, he put the hearse in the garage for once. I jogged over to my house to tell my mom where I was at. She was at the counter eating some cereal, all dressed for work. "Hey mom," I started, "I'm going over to Eli's today, I'll be back around nine or ten."

"I'm going to work, can I trust you to be home at eight?"

"Mom, why? I'm always home at nine or ten when I'm over there."

"Emma, are you dating this boy," she sighed rubbing her eyes.

I blushed, "No Mom, I'm not. We're just friends."

"I wouldn't mind if you were, I hope you know. But if you are, I don't like you over there that late."

I sighed and walked to the door. "If we were, which we aren't, and were going to do stuff, which we don't, then it doesn't matter what time it's at. We're still going to do it. Which we don't!"

I stormed over to Eli's house and into the kitchen. He was getting us some soda. I huffed and dropped into the stool.

"What's wrong," he asked still pouring his own glass and passing me mine.

"Just my Mom. She's so stressed over the trial this weekend that she's delusional."

He laughed, "About what?"

I took a sip of my soda, then cleared my throat. "She wants me home early tonight because she thinks that you and I are mating like wild animals."

He choked on his pop, coughing it up violently and all over his black Rancid shirt.

I laughed, jumping off the stool and away from the direct line of fire.

"What the hell," he muttered, looking down at his shirt in disgust.

"I'm," I snorted, "so sorry," I laughed, "I didn't know you'd almost die by choking on pop!"

He glared at me, "Let's just go upstairs."

I trotted up the stairs first, letting Eli follow me. In his room and went to his bed and laid belly down.

I was almost horrified when Eli stripped off his shirt, directly in front of me, and walked around his room looking for a new one. I blinked a couple times, seeing if it was real. And by God it was real.

His necklace was still on, black and silver resting on his collar like a choker almost. Pale white as can be, but marvelous biceps. They were the size of my neck. There was a little bit of hair on his chest, like a slight dust. But his abs, oh God he had a small six pack. Just enough to see that he had one, but not to noticeable. A somewhat thick trail of hair started under his bellybutton and disappeared into his low riding jeans, that hung off his hips covering the 'V' of his body.

"Emma, why don't you turn on the TV or something," he mumbled turning around and heading into the closet. Hiding his self from me and showing me his lean back.

I shook my head quickly, blinking rapidly and licking my lips. I glanced down to see I actually _drooled _all over Eli's comforter. I grabbed his remote and flipped the TV on to Life with Derek.

We seriously sat for three hours and laughed watching stupid shows and making our own commentary. After my laughing died down, and my breathing evened, I sighed. Feeling kind of tired. "You think you can ask your Mom to stay until nine just to finish the movie," he gave me a puppy pout.

"My Mom's at work," I laughed softly, cuddling his comforters to me in the corner. My arm was under my head, which was propped up by his pillows I stole, and he was getting off the bed to put in the new DVD. "She won't know if I come home late."

He walked to the side of the bed and crawled up next to me and crossed his arms behind his head propped up against the wall. I yawned softly, rubbing my eye. "So what movie did you get that you wanted me to see so badly that we had to come over here to watch...and I thought we were getting take out too," I glared playfully at him from below.

He laughed holding his arms up in defense, "Honestly I don't have enough for take out. And we're watching Invisible. "

"So I don't get amazing food? I wanted to get all fat and lazy too," I sighed.

He ruffled my hair, "There's no way you could be fat."

I poked his armpit and stuck my tongue out.

"Careful," he smiled pressing play on the DVD remote, "I'll bite off your tongue."

I rolled my eyes, trying to hide my blush.

It had only been five minutes into the movie and I was already bored. I sat up and stretched my arms, rubbing the back of my head before falling backwards slightly to rest in my warm blankets again. Instead I was met with something soft and warm. I turned my head slightly to see Eli's face.

"What do you think you're doing," I whispered trying to look anywhere but his eyes and lips.

"Getting comfortable," he smirked, "if you don't feel comfortable I'll move."

I shrugged turning my head so it rested on his chest. My forearm laid next to my face on his chest, while the other was tucked under me.

I glanced to see his other arm was behind his head still, and the one closest to me was laying next to me.

"No it's fine I guess," I snuggled deeper into his side.

Halfway through the movie and I was lost. And it was all Eli's fault. His hand was clutching my shoulder, thumb rubbing circles. Abruptly he snapped his arm out and started to itch his hip. I laughed at the weird scene. A sigh passed through his lips, making me smile wider.

"That was funny," I stated relaxing back against his chest while he arm went behind his head again.

"I had an itch, sorry to disturb your peacefulness," he grunted.

"Watch," I lifted my hand up and over to his hip were he was itching, over his shirt I scratched my nails up and down. "Just say something next time okay? I think you almost snapped my neck."

He rolled his eyes, smiling. Not but twenty minutes later he twitched. "Same spot," I sighed lifting my hand up again. He nodded twitching again. I started to scratch. "Itch harder," he grunted, tensing up. I slipped my fingers under the shirt nonchalantly. Really though, my heart was hammering and I was giddy in glee with the chance to touch his bare stomach.

I lightly scratched my nails on his flaming bare skin, watching his face relax with a queer smile.

"Lower," he mumbled. So I moved my nails a fraction of an inch. Then another inch. Scratching away with my face on his chest, watching his reaction; waiting to see what stupid thing I'd do next.

"Lower, Jesus girl," he laughed. I raised an eyebrow and removed my hand completely. "If you need to be itched lower, you do it yourself. That's boxer land, and Emma doesn't go there," I replied relaxing against him again.

His hand met my lower back, pressing his fingers under my shirt. I jumped slightly, almost bumping my head into his jaw. "Eli," I almost panted. His fingers slid in between my pants, underwear, and onto my bare skin, at my butt crack to be exact.

"This is underwear land," he announced sounding like a Captain, "and I, Eli, totally just went there."

I blushed, shyly looking up to meet his eyes. He wasn't smiling, and his eyes looked much more dark than normal.

Even with our faces so close, I was surprised to see his face come closer. My eyes never left his though. Only when I could feel his breath against my lips did my breath hitch. I glanced down, and it looked like we were kissing. My eyes shot back up to his when his hand slid to cup my butt completely. His eyes searched mine. And please God, let them be searching for a kiss. I honestly almost didn't mind that his hot hand was clutching my bare ass. It was tingly but amazing all the same.

"Emma," my name bounced off my own lips when he said it.

The moment his lips touched mine, I felt weightless with so much more weighing me down. It was like defying the laws of gravity. If he wasn't holding me there against him, I thought I would have floated away. My eyes had long ago closed, my hands shaking on his chest. His other hand came around to grasp my neck and the back of my head, holding it to his face.

His lips left mine, only to open a little more and press against mine again. He stole my breath, starting to kiss me harder. My lips glided over his just as fast, just as urgent and demanding. I started to sit up, but all the while his hand on my bottom pulled me closer to him, to where I was straddling his lap.

I broke the kiss to tilt my head the other way and press my lips against his again. Suddenly his tongue brushed against the seem of my lips. After our lips closed and opened again for the next advance, I opened mine wider. I felt his tongue slide into my mouth, its bottom touching my bottom lip before it made contact with my own tentatively.

I moaned. I fucking moaned.

Eli's hand squeezed my bare flesh again.

What the hell was I doing? Making out with Eli Goldsworthy, on his lap, and his hand was down my pants on my ass to top it all off.

I torn away, pressing my hand to my mouth, panting and trying to even my breathing.

His hand was rubbing my back; up and down, up and down. I looked up, to see if he was as shocked as I was. Instead he tried to kiss me again. Our lips were only pressed together for a second before I pushed him away. "Eli, I'm seeing someone," I breathed, looking him dead in the eye.

He looked heartbroken. "I thought you said you'd tell me if you were dating someone?"

"It's not serious," I clutched my shirt above my heart, willing it to stop beating so fast.

"What do you mean?"

"We hang out every once in a while, usually on the weekends and stuff, when we both have time. We make out every once in a while, but that's it," I told him in a rush. Immediately I felt the weight of my actions. I felt guilty, like I was cheating on _Eli_ with Mark. "Eli, I don't even know his last name."

He looked pained for a moment, before looking angry. "Does he go to Degrassi?"

"Yeah, his name is Mark, he's in one of my classes," I looked down, ashamed of myself.

Even though I shouldn't, because this whole thing could have been a mistake.

"Well if it's not serious," he said calmly, tilting my head up to look him in the eyes, "then you and I can be serious."

Did... did Elijah Israel Goldsworthy just say he wanted to be serious, with_ me_?

"W-what," I stuttered.

He tilted my chin to the side, pressing his lips to my neck and jaw. I whimpered slightly, because the feeling of his lips on my skin set me aflame.

"I want to be serious with you Emma," he murmured into my collarbone.

"Do you like me," I whispered, "or are you just looking for a fuck-buddy?"

His head snapped away, both of his hands coming around in between our bodies. He took a heavy silver ring in the shape of a dragon off his pinky and lifted up my own. He slipped it onto my left hand ring finger and brought it up to his lips to kiss it.

"Emma Lee, I want a full committed relationship where I'm your boyfriend and you're my girlfriend," he stated, "where we don't see anyone else and go on dates and introduce each other to our parents and date for a long time hopefully."

I felt my eyes watering up somewhat. "Why now? I thought you liked Clare?"

"I did like Clare, I only liked her because she reminded me of Julia. Now I realize that I've changed, and my tastes have changed. Clare isn't right for me, because I want to move on from Julia. I want to move on with _you_.

"You make me see everything differently. I laugh more with you, I feel alive with you, and I miss you when you walk out the door. When I thought I liked Clare, I felt like it was all wrong; like I was doing an everyday thing. With you I always get this tingle in my spine, and my stomach feels empty, with like-something wiggling around in there. Everyday is a mystery with you. I don't know what's going to happen next.

"I think it was the Halloween party when I realized it. I freaked out for hours until I looked and saw you in your room around midnight. I still wanted to go over and talk to you, but I couldn't."

"Alli told me you kissed Clare," I whispered, not even processing yet what he was actually saying.

An annoyed expressed passed his face. "Clare kissed me. We were just talking. She asked me if I liked her. That's when I was like 'I deserve to be happy. I loved Julia but she cheated on me. What happened was an accident.' So I said 'kinda'. So I told her that I liked you too. So she kissed me, and I said 'Hey why not' and kissed her back. I didn't like it at all. It was like Julia all over again. It was so wrong. "

Life was starting to turn around.

I looked at the dragon ring, amazed how it actually fit my finger somehow. It all started to set in. This was _Elijah's _ring; and it was on my finger. The finger that an engagement ring or a wedding ring goes. Well it doesn't really matter, because the ring is neither, but he put it there himself. He wanted me to have it.

"Mark has been driving me home from school, not my Mom, sorry I lied," I mumbled, coming back to the situation at hand.

"Why did you though?"

"I thought if I told you, you'd want to meet him. I didn't want you to hate me."

He smiled softly at me, pressing his lips to my forehead. I looked up and pressed my lips to his, sighing in content that I could actually do it rather than dream about it now.

He smiled pressing his lips back.


	8. Chapter 8

The next day Eli brought me home, we hadn't exchanged so many words while at school. Just shy smiles every once in a while.

When getting out of Morty, I squeezed his hand and said my thanks, and I'd text him later.

Mom left for work at eight, and I was just cleaning up my mess that I made for dinner. I heard the door open, and I didn't think much of it because I just assumed that it was her coming back to grab something she had forgotten. Just as I was putting away the last dish that I had, something closed in around my stomach.

A scream left my mouth, my arms flailing left and right, smacking whatever was behind me.

"Emma, calm down, it's me Eli," he chuckled behind me. I calmed my breathing, fighting out of his arms just to turn around and smack him in the chest repeatedly.

"What the fuck is wrong with you," I shouted. His hand enclosed around my wrists, bringing them back and around his neck with a smirk as I tumbled into him. All the feelings I had been feeling for him came rushing back. Yesterday was in full heat running around my veins. I wanted to feel his lips against mine again, the velvety smoothness. How his iron strong arms enclosed around me, making me small and fragile.

"It's just casual right, so there's nothing wrong with us right now," he whispered.

What's just casual? I furrowed my brows, starring at him.

Mark and I are just casual.

Everything burned within me. "Yeah that pretty much sums it up," I whispered back. "Did you wait for my mom to leave before you hurried over here?"

He nodded faintly, starring in hunger right back at me.

"Eli," I sighed, hating what I was about to say, "we can wait until this weekend, me and Mark will be over. It's just a few more days, and it's not like we're going to jump in the sack right away."

I watched as his face turned slowly red. The thing of it was, was that Eli wasn't a virgin. We both knew this. He was a teenage boy with raging hormones just like anyone else his age. The other thing was that he hinted many times throughout our friendship that he wouldn't mind getting intimate. Sure before I even had a clue that he liked me, he made some flirtatious comments about something sexual; but that was the way Eli is. And it wasn't something I didn't doubt.

I didn't take him for the boy that would sleep with any girl just to get some, but if given the chance, I think he wouldn't reject me if _I _gavehim that chance.

He didn't know I was a virgin though. I didn't want to jump him and let him have it the moment we both came clean. But it didn't leave the back of my head at the first flirt. It just had my mind whirling with the possibilities.

Honest to God, the thought of even doing anything remotely sexual with Eli had be hot and bothered. Yet I wanted to wait. To make it mean something if we ever did. He would be my first, and I wanted it to be nice. Not some common one night stand.

"I know that," he murmured, bringing a hand up to brush my cheek with the back of his finger. "No lie, but I think I'd die a happy man if you would sleep with me. But I won't ask you for it, or insinuate it or anything. I hope you know that.

"I'm not emotionally ready, and I think it's safe to say the same for you. But I'm defiantly going to sleep better tonight if you let me have this one little tweak."

I couldn't stop the giggle that bubbled from my throat. "Tweak? What am I, a drug?"

His expression remained serious, "Only the most addicting. I don't know how to describe it, I just feel more _assured. _Like the feeling you get when you know for a fact that you got an A on your French paper because you checked the night before, rather than wait until class the next day waiting for surprise."

I pressed my lips together in a thin line.

"Well," I sighed, taking his hand in mine and pulling him behind me as I started towards the stairs. "I don't see a problem with a little reassurance."

Not even two steps into my room and his hands were on my waist, lips crushing against mine in front of panted breath. I smiled, wielding my hands through his hair.

We stumbled backwards onto my bed, his hands running up my sides and down my back.

It wasn't long before I was settled on his lap, letting soft sighs of pleasure leave my lips.

Eli moved his lips along my jaw. Heat flooded my body, a ball of _something_ started to curl in the pit of my stomach. My hands were under Eli's shirt, touching his own flaming skin. I opened my eyes, dragging the shirt up more. How could such amazing abs be pale as hell and hotter than a sauna?

I rested my head on his shoulder, watching my hair curtain around my face, but still see my hands on his stomach. Eli's teeth grazed my neck, making my fingers dig into his skin. I moaned, closing my eyes and letting my body tingle with his touch. He hand moved on my own stomach over my shirt, up and onto my chest. The feel of his hand on my breast had me wiggling and whimpering.

It started to rub softly while his teeth nipped at my earlobe.

"Eli," I groaned out. He's motions stopped, moving his hands away from my completely.

"Sorry," he whispered, "it just happened."

"We should stop," I murmured, pulling away and resting against the wall.

In a second he was up and pacing my room in front of the bed.

"You're breaking it off with Mark then right," asked. I nodded slowly. Why _wouldn't _I break it off with Mark?

"When?"

"Tomorrow," I sighed. Today Mark and I talked behind school again. He said he'd come to pick me up around six at the Dot, we'd go to the ravine and talk. "Right after school. It'll be an hour or two."

He came to sit on the bed again, at my feet. "Does your mom know about Mark?"

I shook my head, watching my hands as I picked at my fingernails. "But I'll tell her about you, when she gets back from the trial."

"Why after the trail?"

I leaned over, pressing my back against his chest and pulled his arms around me. "If I told her Saturday, before she goes, then she'll probably demand that I go to, to prevent me from having some inappropriate wild sexual settings with my new boyfriend."

"Point taken," he chuckled, playing with the dragon ring on my finger. He sighed, "What time do you think you'll be home tomorrow."

"I don't know," I sighed too, "maybe six, seven? Not to long. Why?"

"We're going to go on a date," he kissed my neck. I giggled, turning and pressing a kiss to his lips.

During the last class of the day; Eli texted me.

_'I'll be at your house waiting for you at six. ;)'_

I smiled, looking around to make sure no one was looking. 'That's fine, just have mom let you in, wait for me in my room.' I replied back. The bell signaled the end of the day.

A heavy sigh flew through me, I had quite a day ahead of me.


	9. Chapter 9

On the steps of the school I could see Mark waiting for me at his car. I was shocked to see that Eli's hearse was sitting next to it. Never had I seen the two vehicles side by side.

Another guy and a Latino chick was waiting with him. When I approached, Mark took me in his arms and started to grab my ass. "Hey," I laughed, smacking him in the chest, "what do you think you're doing?" I was slightly uncomforted with him touching me there, but I pushed the thought aside. There wasn't ever a time where he was ungentlemanly.

"Ready to go babe," he whispered in my ear and groped me harder. I jumped slightly wrapping my hands around his neck. After a quick release, with his arm around my shoulder we walked to the car. The Latino chick with him smirked at me, "Bianca." Her thumb extended behind her at the other guy, "Owen."

I smiled nervously at the two, waving softly.

Without another word I got into the passenger seat, cringing at the smell of smoke. It never smelled like that before. I looked over to the driver's side, watching as Mark was about to get in. Suddenly he slammed his door and smiled, walking back to the end of the car.

I was about to open the door, but Bianca pushed it back shut. "You don't want to get in the middle of this hun."

I turned in my seat, watching as Mark strut up to _Eli_. Oh God, he found out about me and Eli. My breath quickened, and my heart picked up quickly. My fingers dug into the upholstery of the seat.

"Hey Emo bitch," Mark sneered at Eli. Eli rolled his eyes and tried walking towards the driver's side of Morty.

"Look, I'm talking to you," he taunted again, shoving Eli by the shoulders. It caused Eli to loose his balance and fall to the ground. I jumped slightly in the seat.

As quick as lightening Eli was up and gathering his dropped things. "Fuck off Fitz."

Fitz?

"You know I still haven't gotten you back for that little fake ID stunt," Mark punched Eli in the gut. My eyes widened, and confusion filled my senses.

So I had to sit back and watch as Mark beat the shit out of Eli, leaving him in the parking lot in a crumpled mess. Mark and Owen were laughing while they got into the car, smirked and yelling in victory when they squealed out of the parking lot. My heart was still hammering in my chest.

"What the hell was that," I asked, pulling my seat belt on and clutching my bag to my chest.

"That's little Goldsworthy, the bitch had it coming to him. He hooked me up with a fake ID and then got me set up so the cops would catch me with it," Mark sneered.

"Mark—"

Bianca laughed loudly and pounded on his seat. "She calls you Mark? What the hell man."

Mark smiled, pulling his hand over to grab mine, entwining our fingers. "My girl can call me whatever she wants to. That's how Fitzy likes it."

"Fitzy," I laughed.

"Last name is Fitzgerald toots."

Mark Fitzgerald?

Within ten minutes we were parked somewhere in the woods, a fire in daylight was flickering and teenagers were already surrounding it. Mark was already over to my side and helping me out, keeping his arm around my shoulders.

I turned to see if Bianca and Owen were following, only to see them going at it like wild animals in heat in the back seat. I blushed, looking forward with Mark. I was slightly scared, due to the fact I just watched him beat Eli up. My chest ached, hoping he was okay. God how I wished I could have jumped out and threw Mark off of him.

"What was it that you wanted to talk about," I asked before we came to the group near the fire.

"About us," he sighed turning towards me and laying both arms horizontally across my shoulders. His face came to be level with mine. "I think it's about time we stepped it up."

"Stepped it up?" What on Earth—I hope he doesn't mean... _sex_.

I shrugged him off, hugging my bag to my chest and taking a step back. "Mark I—I'm a _virgin_. I'm not ready for sex."

He chuckled, pulling me with him over to the logs. There was three guys and a girl already seated along the first. One guy was big boned and wearing a small army cap. Another was drinking a beer and joking with him and the girl. She was also drinking and smoking, laughing at whatever he said.

The last tucked a pocket book in his camo jeans. A small army hat on his head too. "I'm heading out, anyone need anything before I come back?"

Mark pulled a ten out of his pocket, waving it to him. "Could you get make some smokes and a _prophylactic _things or whatever your big word for 'em are," he passed the bill to the clearly older boy.

Smokes, Mark smokes? Why didn't I know nor figured it out? He never smelled like it or tasted like it when we kissed.

"When did you start smoking," I asked.

"I don't know, few days ago? I used to, then I quit because my parole officer said he'd take me to juvie if I didn't, because 'I'm not eighteen yet' as he put it."

_Parole officer, juvie. _Who the hell have I been hooking up with? I don't even know this guy. He sounds like he's a everyday punk hooligan. My phone rang, the one that told me I had a text, so I opened it. It was from Eli, my eyes widened as I snapped it shut. Since I had a Razor, the time popped up on the front screen. It was already edging on four thirty.

"Who was it," Mark started kissing my neck. I cringed, pushing him off for the fourth or fifth time today.

"My mom, wanting to know where I was."

It started to get dark, and Mark was practically chain smoking next to me, sipping on a beer and talking to the other people that were there. I don't know how long it had been since I checked the time last, but my phone started to vibrate for the third time. I had put it on silent, because the last thing I needed was for Mark to see that _Eli _of all people was texting me. He'd probably beat Eli up again just for that.

I was starting to get fed up. Every time I said his name, he'd start to kiss and grope me openly in front of these people. The smoke was making me nauseas, but I kept telling myself by the end of the night I wouldn't be with Mark in any sense anymore. I'd be going home to Eli.

I finally snapped at some point. I didn't know what time it was, but it was completely dark by then. Mark's friends were taunting him about being tied down with a _girlfriend_ and ragging on him because we hadn't done it yet. That's when he shoved his hands in between my thighs and started to rub on my groin. Enraged, I threw his hand off and stood up. "Mark we need to talk, now," I started to yell.

I didn't mean to raise my voice, but it only encouraged his friends to tease him more. They were elbowing him and making horrible impressions of me and him both. Mark stood, looking pissed, and dragged me over towards the abandoned van over to the side of the fire. There was a curtain of sorts covering the inside from view of the outside world.

I went in first.

There was an old dirty twin mattress laying on the floor of the back, old condom wrappers and cans of beer, and various other things littering about. It smelled of stale beer.

"What's wrong now," he grumbled, clearly agitated.

My phone vibrated again. Consistently. I tried to ignore it, but it was buzzing against the metal wall I was leaning against loudly. "Answer the Goddamned call," Mark spat. I opened it, eyes widening again, seeing that it was a voice mail, and the only person who had been calling was Eli. "Well who is it," Mark yelled. I slapped it shut, glancing at the time. It was roaming in on eight.

"N-no one," I sputtered, pushing it in my back pocket.

Mark's steely gray eyes met mine. "Who was it Layla," he asked again, standing and taking a few steps to meet me.

Panic flooded me again, "No one, it was a wrong number."

Next thing I knew his hands were on my shoulders, pulling me over and pushing me onto my stomach on the bed, his thighs straddling the back of my thighs. "Wrong number my ass," he muttered. I could feel his hands digging through my back pocket and retrieving the phone.

"You're 'wrong number' left you a voice mail," he grumbled. I heard the beep of him holding down the 1 button.

The next thirty-three seconds were spent in silence.

"I tried to be a nice guy," he pressed down on my back after he threw my phone on the floor of the van, "and I treated you right and did everything you Goddamned asked."

His hands were pressing under my shirt pulling it up. "Stop, what are you—"

I was cut off, Mark hit the back of my head with his hand.

"I did everything, _everything, _and you go around fucking that Emo bitch _Goldsworthy_ over me?"

Oh God.

Mark's rough hands flipped me over.

"No Mark," I seethed, struggling against him, "we were both just a casual fling and _you _knew it. No strings attached."

He barred his teeth, snarling, "Yeah? Well I wanted more, and I'll be damned if anyone, especially Emo bitch, goes pissin' on my territory."

"I didn't. It takes two to tango, and I don't want to dance with the likes of you."

Mark took both of my wrists in one of his hands, holding it above my head. His other started to pull at my pants.

"I'm getting my earnings in," he smirked evilly, "whether you like it or not."

"I already told you, I'm a virgin. I haven't done anything with Eli."

My pants were off, and shoved in my mouth, gagging me. The cold air started to hit my bare legs and thighs, and without much time passing my underwear was off too. By now tears were falling down my cheeks. My wrists were sore and straining against Mark's hand. It was hard to try and kick him when he was pushing so hard against my thigh that it felt like the muscles would snap from the stretching he was causing.

His lips were slobbering all over my chest and shoulders, his hand rubbing harshly against my genitalia. I was at the point were my throat was raw from all the efforts of screaming and failing.

"Well good," he panted, his hand moved to his growing need, stroking it in a sick ecstasy. "Never had a virgin before."

He adjusted our bodies, so he was kneeling on my chest, my eyes widened. He tore the pants from my mouth and replaced it with _him._ I gagged instantly. His hand was pressing into my neck, thumb pushing against my windpipe.

"No teeth," he hissed, "or I choke your bitch ass face out."

I couldn't breath, and I was sobbing hard, trying not to gag more. He was bucking into my face, slamming my head down onto the floor with each of his movements, off the mattress. My body shook with sobs. It was disgusting, it was wrong, it was _Fitz_. I didn't want this, I didn't want him.

Minutes later my mouth filled with a hot liquid, salty and disgusting.

It wasn't hard to tell that he just spent himself in my mouth.

And just like that he rearranged himself again to he was between my legs, his hand still on my throat. I turned my head, feeling it coming before it happened. I vomited on the floor, choking on it as it came up and out. The taste that was in my mouth afterwards was more rancid than anything.

More time passed, and Fitz was touching me every where he wanted, and I could do nothing. He was touching himself when he wasn't touching me. I wanted to just pass out and not live this—this horrid thing that he was doing. Why me? What the hell did I get myself into?

Without warning, it felt as if I had been stabbed with an iron burning hot pole right through my body and into my soul. I gasped loudly, but the sound dying in a muffle by the pants in my mouth. Everything trembled, everything burned; everything hurt. _Pain. _Pure utter pain. Now I was screaming full force, trashing around, trying to get him _out_ of me.

Mark bucked his hips towards mine, moaning loudly. "Feel that bitch, you're _mine. _This is mine. Always."

It didn't last long. Maybe two minutes, three. It didn't matter though, it felt like a lifetime. I could smell the blood in the air, the sweaty musk that followed his final grunt as a lava liquid filled me.

He laid on top of me then, tears were still falling endlessly off my face then, but he let go of me completely. Only then though, I was so tired and weak that I could barely move myself.

No words were spoken, the only sound of my soft sniffles and gasps of pain while he finally exited my body. I watched through blood shot and puffy eyes as Mark pulled up his pants and left the van. A loud victorious cheer came from the other side.

I must have blacked out, because I woke up. There wasn't the sound of laughing outside the van, or that of Mark's voice recalling the crime he had just committed. Silence. I turned my head weakly to the side, arm straining painfully to reach across the floor to grasp my phone.

The newly cracked small square screen on the front read 1:03 A.M.

"Hello," a gruff voice came from the van entrance. It echoed off the metal walls and bounced in my ears. I couldn't place a face to the voice, but I didn't throw caution to the wind either. I curled up in a fetal position and didn't make a sound. Hopefully who ever the male voice belonged to would leave.

"I know you're in here," it called again, softer, more understanding. "I'm here to help."

Help? How could anyone help? Get a time machine and take me back to earlier that day, where I wouldn't have gotten in the car with Mark, with _Fitz_.

He came into the van, close enough where she could move just softly and touch his shoe.

Something heavy and light at the same time landed on her. "Put this on," he murmured.

It took five minutes for me to cry, groan, whimper; everything that described pain to put on that damned jacket. It was warm, yes, but the roughness of it hurt against my skin.

Arms enclosed around my legs and back, lifting me up into a solid chest and a 'oof' filling my ears.

I caught glance of the dying embers of the fire. No one was at it, just beer cans and cigarettes littering around the seats.

When I opened my eyes again, mystery guy was placing me in the front seat of a small red Mazda.

Once the car was started, I finally turned to my captor/rescuer. Was he to be trusted, or was he to be feared?

He was one of the boys from the fire. The one that bought Fitz the cigarettes.

It looked oddly familiar. The small army hat was gone, but his hair was messy and short. It seemed like it _should _have been long. I don't know, the blond mess didn't look right short. Light blue eyes met mine, and another sort of understanding passed through me. He was here to help, and it felt like he was someone I should know. I have never seen him in my life no, but it just _was_.

It was like meeting your best friend for the first time but you already knew everything about them even though you never met them.

"You're Layla," he stated simply.

"And you're..." I left it off.

"Johnny," he responded.

_Demarco_.

It went unsaid, but it was known. No wonder I knew who it was. Alli practically spilled out his life and everything she knew about him the day she and I met.

"Do you want to go to the hospital?"

"No."

"Then where can I take you?"

Alli's name was on the tip of my tongue. No, I couldn't do that to them. Nor could I just show up at almost two in the morning. I'm sure her parents wouldn't agree with that.

"I—I don't know," I stuttered out.

_Elijah_.

Just like that, the world crashed down on my shoulders.

This happened because Fitz hated Eli. How many times had I heard them all talking about Fitz and never could I make the connection? I was dancing with the damn devil and didn't even know it.

He hated Eli because _I _wanted Eli.

"I could take you to my friend's place," he said, finally moving the car.

Eli's going to hate me. He's not going to want anything to do with me. Just because Fitz got to me. He _stole _my virginity. Eli will want nothing to do with me now.

My heart cracked at the thought.

"Please," I whimpered, trying to will myself not to cry anymore.

I opened my phone, looking at all the missed calls.

Fifteen from my mother, twenty-six from Alli, and only three from Eli. And one voice mail.

I knew it was his. I wanted to hear his voice more than anything right now.

"You have no new voice messages. To hear previous messages press one.

"Message at 11:02 P.M."

"Hey," Eli sounded depressed, "Your mom let me in your room. I've been here since six, and it's bee four hours. You're still not here, I'm kinda worried. But I guess you and Mark are just dandy.

"But whatever, I just run my mind anyway. I left my key on your desk when you get home. Come over any time. If I'm sleeping, just... just wake me up, okay? Hopefully I'll see you soon. I miss holding you, I miss you."

Everything crumbled beneath my fingers. He already wants to hate me. _This _is what Fitz listened to on my phone. _This _is what set him off. I sobbed loudly, slapping my phone shut and clutching it in my hands to the point where it started to break under my hold.

"What's wrong," Johnny asked worriedly.

I felt so sick. Not only did I feel dirty and rancid, but the fact that Fitz stole my virtue and it might as well not only caused me my life but Eli. I wanted to go to his house and crawl into his bed with him and sleep, sleep next to him holding me and knowing that everything would be alright when I woke up. The sound of his weak tired voice wanted me to cry more.

I kicked at the floor board, not caring that it hurt my bare feet.

"We're almost there," Johnny said, "we'll look after you, I promise."

I didn't care. I sobbed louder, pulling at my hair and banging my head on the dashboard. Johnny's hand came out and tried to stop me, but there wasn't much he could do while driving.

By the time he parked the car, I was so wore out I was ready to pass out right there slumped against the dash.

I was in Johnny's arms in a matter of minutes, his feet smacking against the cement walkway with stride.

His feet kicked at the door, and while trying to balance me with one arm, he started to slam furiously at the door.

A light came on. The door opened.

"What the fuck Demarco. Do you know it's 2:30 in the Goddamned—"

I perked up. It sounded different in person, his voice. Rather than soft and depressed on the phone, now he was angry and demanding. I melted right into Johnny's grasp, now I knew for sure I was safe.

My hand shook as it reached out to grab him. "Elijah."


	10. Chapter 10

"Emma," he almost shouted, sounding shocked. He must have noticed my attire.

With the speed of lightening Eli stole my broken body from Johnny and walked me through the kitchen and into the living room. Before he started to sit me into the love seat I noticed it was covered in a sheet and blankets, messy as hell.

I moaned, at pain and relief when the warmth that engulfed me around the couch was that of Eli's smell and warmth. Now I know I could fall asleep peacefully.

"What happened," he murmured, taking my face in his hands.

I held out my phone towards Johnny, "I need you to call Alli and have her call my Mom and tell her that I'm staying over there tonight, I don't want her to worry."

Johnny's eyes darkened, a firm frown on his face. A stare down happened, and I gestured to him with the phone again. "She will love to hear from you," I whispered.

So he took my phone and left the room. Left Eli and I.

"Where are your parents," the question was killing me. Normally I never saw them, but I didn't particularly like the thought of them meeting me for the first time on their love seat practically naked.

A weird look passed over Eli's face, like I was crazy or something, then one of understanding. "I'm emancipated, they moved to California, they send me money every month for rent. They'll be back in August when I go to college."

We were always alone at his house.

I gulped, taking in the new information. But I felt myself about to vomit again. Fitz's nasty taste filling my mouth again. I pointed to the trash can as my eyes widened. Eli grabbed it quickly, thrusting it to me just as I started to puke into it. "Mouthwash and washrag," I moaned out with my face in the trash.

After coming back, Eli was taking the trash from me, then took my face in his hands. He began to wipe my face, starting at my forehead and over my eyes. The cool dampness made me sigh.

At my mouth, he started to wipe at the corners of my lips. His hand pushing harder against my skin. "Emma, what is this," he asked. What was what? On my face? My hand rose to the corners, fingers scraping against the hard flakiness. When I pulled it away, it was white.

Oh God.

I reached for the trash can just before I retched again. Just the thought of it made me rip out my insides and throw them up into a bin.

"Did Mark—" Eli cut himself off, eyes widening and darkening at the same time. "I'll fucking kill him." My lip trembled, looking up at him I couldn't not think about what happened when I should have been here with him. No way in hell would I tell him that Mark was Fitz.

A new can of worms would open. One that was full of anacondas rather than worms.

Softly he wiped away the rest of Fitz's evidence. I took the mouthwash and swished it around before actually spitting it out into the bin and swallowing the second batch I took. Then I drank the glass of water in one breath. All the work had me breathless and laying against the pillows again to catch my breath.

"He raped you didn't he," Eli hissed. I didn't have to answer, his eyes flared to life, telling me he knew. Eli cursed before jumping up and storming around the living room, throwing whatever he could find and smashing it. Johnny came back in, new smirk wiped off his face at the site.

He clapped Eli on the back. "I know man, I want to kill Fitz too."

Silence.

Eli was starring at me with such an intensity that I wanted to look away, but I couldn't.

"Fitz," he looked at Johnny, to me. "You were being casual with fucking _Fitz?_ Mark fucking Fitzgerald?"

His voice was getting louder by each and every word. The look of realization passed his face.

His eyes actually watered, starring at me in horror. The look of devastation passed his face, one that showed me what he probably looked like the day Julia died.

In an instant he was up, turning towards the wall and punching; _through_ it. Like a cycle he moved from space to space punching holes in the drywall like it was a piece of paper. After eight holes Johnny jumped into action, tackling Eli and yelling. "Knock it off man! Calm down, she needs you now."

"Why Fitz," he screamed, "why did it fucking have to be _him_?"

Breaking from Johnny's grip he walked over to me, knuckles dripping blood in their wake. He fell to his knees in front of me, starring at my legs, at my mouth, at my chest, at my womanhood; every where but my eyes. The places where Fitz violated me. Giant beads of salt water, tears, fell from his eyes and onto his face, not bothering to wipe them away. "I didn't know it was him. I didn't know he was the _Fitz. _Not until earlier when we got to the ravine," I cried, curling up into myself, away from his eyes. The jade green eyes I've grown to love.

"He stole my phone and listened to the message you left," I breathed, trying to breath evenly as I sobbed and talked.

"Shi-it," I heard him sob himself. I looked up.

He was wiping tears from his face now. But it was bloodied from his knuckles, wet and slick with blood and salt water.

I grabbed his wrist, not wanting him to get more blood on himself.

Without hesitation he grabbed the nape of my neck, cradling my head while he pulled my face to his shoulder. He held and rocked me while we both cried.

I cried for Eli, for myself, for everything that just happened, from the moment my dad put a knife to my neck, from seeing Stephen cheating on me, from Eli craving Clare, from me craving Eli, from the moment I realized I didn't want to live in Toronto without him.

"I'm so sorry," I whined, "He listened to the message and then I told him we were done, and—and he went ballistic. He just-just—"

"Shhh," Eli was hugging me more, hushing me with light squeezes of my arm. "Don't think about it."

I pulled my arms around his neck and squeezed tight, this was the safest I felt all night.

"I got to go meet Alli," Johnny's voice called out. Eli didn't flinch, nor pull away.

I started to pull away, because it started to bore down on me that I was naked if not for Johnny's jacket, and I felt really dirty.

"Can I get cleaned up now," I whispered.

Eli pulled away, his face solemn. I pulled the sheets around me more, hiding myself even though I knew he wasn't looking. My legs shook as I got up, biting back my gasp of surprise when I suddenly fell back to the couch. The area between my legs were burning and aching at the same time with such a intensity that I wanted to cry all over again.

I want to give up. I want to jump in front of a train and let everything just settle.

Eli was picking me up, pressing me against his naked chest. His skin was warm to the touch, soft and silky almost. It didn't really come to mind until now. Eli was sleeping on the couch in his pajama pants, shirtless.

I cuddled against him, loving it.

My emotions were all out of wack. One second I want to end everything and just be, and then the next I want to ball them all up and throw them towards Eli and _love_ him. The way I want him to love me back.

In the bathroom Eli set me down on the toilet seat. "I'll go get some clothes and a towel," he murmured before leaving.

Minutes later he returned, a shirt, sweats, and boxers resting on top of the towels. Without so much as looking at me, he turned and started to run water into the tub. Still he busied himself, turning towards the closet and grabbing another washrag, dipping it in the water and getting it wet. Changing the temperatures of the knobs, fiddling with things on the selves of the wall.

"Anything else you need," he muttered, leaning over the tub, his back to me.

"Yes Elijah Israel Goldsworthy," I kicked his butt with my foot, "I need you to fucking look at me damn it!"

His back straightened.

He turned his head, still on his knees and looked at me.

My shaky hand rose and rested on his shoulder, and he flinched at the contact, but still turning to look at me fully. "I'm still alive," I choked out, "I'm still me. Please don't look at me like I'm disgusting and dead."

I noticed his eyes widened slightly, but a look of guilt and a grimace masked his face.

I grabbed his hand, pressing it just under my left shoulder on my chest. Desperately he tried to jerk his hand away. When he succeeded I just grabbed his face in both my hands. In my own desperation, to show him that I wasn't any different than the night before, pressed the side of his head against where his hand just was.

If he couldn't hear my rapidly beating heart, the boy was deaf. The second the action was committed, he froze motionless. "See," I breathed, "I'm still me."

His steamy hand grasped my side, the heat melting into my skin.

"I—" he cut himself off, "I didn't want to scare you, by touching you—"

"Normal is fine Eli," I whispered, lacing my fingers through his equally silky black hair. "Normal is fine."

"I'm so sorry Emma," he quivered. His hot breath bouncing off my chest rose goosebumps on it.

"Shhh," I hushed, "you have nothing to be sorry about."

I pulled his face from my chest, breathing oddly as I wiped my eyes again. "Do you want me to leave," he asked, scrunching his eyebrows in worry.

"Please don't," I looked to him, back to the warm water, "can you just sit here?"

We traded places, him sitting and me leaning over the tub. He turned toward the door and away from me. I shed the sheet, crawling into the tub carefully. I hissed at the heat of the water, watching out of the corner of my eyes as Eli flinched towards me, like he was about to turn around and help. My heart went out to him, because even though he wanted to turn and help he didn't; he respected me.

In the tub I sighed in contentment. Sure it was pretty hot, but it was relaxing none the less.

I grabbed the rag and lathered it up with soap. It smelled like Eli, something that I smiled at.

Starting at my face I scrubbed, I scrubbed until it started to burn. I didn't stop though, I continued down onto my shoulders and arms, to my stomach and hips. Not bothering to stop I continued to between my legs, hissing in pain at the pain. Before it was a dull throb, calmed after the brute force crime. Now it was a raging fire, stinging worse when the soap glided over it.

"Are you okay," Eli's urgent voice met my ears. I had almost forgot he was even there.

Still facing the door, his knuckles were turning white from keeping such a hard grip on the seat of the toilet.

"F-fine," I seethed out while clenching my teeth.

I rubbed vigorously none the less, grunting and whining every once in a while. I continued to scrub at my thighs and calves, ending at my feet.

After rising with water from the facet I took out the plug, letting the water leave.

It took about seven minutes for it all to drain out. And by that time I was heaving for breath and hands shaking. They rose to grasp the sides of the tub, using what strength I had left trying to lift myself from the tub. But my strength left me back in the van.

"Eli," I gasped out, "can you help me out of the tub?"

I watched the muscles ripple under the skin of his back. Slowly he rose, turning towards me with determination. Grasping the towel, he looked only at my face while he approached and wrapped it around me. Without effort he lifted me from the porcelain and sitting me gently on the toilet seat.

"Lift your arms," he whispered grabbing his black Escape the Fate shirt. I did as much as I possibly could, watching as he slipped it over them and over my head. His fingers traced my throat to the back of my neck where they pulled my wet hair out from under the shirt. Then his hands were pushing my feet through a pair of his plaid boxers.

He pulled the towel out from under the shirt. "Put your arms around my neck," he murmured.

Again I did what he asked as much as I could. I was shocked to feel him hoist me up with one arm and pull the boxers up with his other hand from the back.

The process repeated with no words spoken for the pajama pants.

Then I was in his arms once again, being carried up the stairs and into his room where he laid me on his bed. He pulled all the blankets around me, and I was drowsy with sleep.

"Elijah Israel Goldsworthy," I rasped out, "if you don't get in this bed with me this instant, you'll have hell to pay when I wake up."

A smile was tugging at his lips, but in the situation at hand it faltered away. He slipped in, and my legs slipped in between his while my arms found their way in between our chests, my hands resting on his. His wrapped around me.

I fell asleep to glazed over green eyes, the smell of Eli; in his warming arms.


	11. Chapter 11

In a dreamland, I would have been at Eli's the whole night. I would have made us something to eat, because Eli can't cook for shit. Then we'd go up to his room and laugh about how stupid a TV show was, then he'd kiss me. It'd go on like that for a while, and before it got to heated, I'd go home to Mom and see her off in the morning. As soon as she left, Eli would come over and we'd laze the day off because it was a Saturday.

Instead, my life was completely opposite. Dreamlands don't exist and things happen; bad things.

In the real world, I was raped by Fitz; spending the majority of the night in a stinky van at the ravine. I intended to break up with him and instead I was served with the punishment of betrayal it seemed. Johnny carried me to Eli's door where the rest of the night was me half worrying about my mom and half worrying about trying to stop Eli from freaking out over Fitz.

My morning was fairly well—because I woke up to Eli snuggled into me as much as I was snuggled into him. My body was numb with pain, which wasn't all that bad until I moved, and the pain had to move and follow the limbs I was moving. All I could smell was Eli, and when I closed my eyes; nothing was wrong. I can imagine we just spent the night together, nothing happened and we fell asleep peacefully in each others arms.

Eli groaned softly next to me, making my eyes laze open. His droopy green eyes met mine, and he smiled weakly. I was all the more taken aback when he moved over just a little more and pressed our lips together. To a point, I honestly thought he was slightly repulsed with me at the moment. I wouldn't blame him, I mean, I wouldn't want to be sucking on someone's face if some guy..._spent_ himself in said mouth.

His hand was grasping my hip, making me take a breath of air sharply.

Suddenly he ripped himself away, both of us opening our eyes. His widened before they closed. The muscles of his jaw flexed as he clenched it. "I'm sorry," he apologised, and the 'o' sounded more like a 'u'. The first time of being with Eli that I heard a slightest bit of a Canadian accent. "I forgot 'bout yesterday." He muttered like he was struggling, to either keep a clean accent or with his thoughts.

I touched his hand that had retreated off my hip and lay between us. "It's fine Eli," I yawned, "you just surprised me is all. Yesterday has nothing to do with it."

Without more words he was up and out of bed. "I'll go make you something to eat," he paused at the door, "call your mom and let her know you're okay. I think she might be worried."

At his words I realised that he was right. Beside Eli's bed was his phone on night stand. I grabbed it as he left the room and started to dial my mom's number. She picked up on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Mom, it's Emma."

"Oh Emma! I was so worried about you! Alli wouldn't let me talk to you, I was about to go over to her house this morning."

Panic filled me before she started talking again.

"...but she said you were already sleeping. Bless her soul for being there with you. I didn't know you and Eli were even going out hun. I thought I asked you to _tell_ me you two were dating. Don't hide it from me, I didn't—"

"Mom," I sighed, "I wasn't dating Eli. It was another boy from school named Mark."

"Well why didn't I know anything about him?"

"It's just—" Eli popped back into the room, pointing to his phone when he noticed I had it. In his hand was my own. "I wasn't serious with him and I didn't want to introduce him to you if it wasn't going to be committed."

My eyes flashed to Eli's ring that still rested on my left hand. Chest heating and constricting I looked towards him. He was looking at the floor, frown in place.

"Okay, that's fine I guess," she muttered. I could just picture her rolling her eyes, "but you'll tell me when you and Eli start dating, right?"

As she was asking the question, I was inhaling. At the point when she said Eli's name, well I was more like choking; on my spit. "Mom!" Eli was over to my side in a second, thumping my back softly.

"What! You two already act like you're dating, and he's okay. I just want you to be able to talk to me about these things—"

"That's not the point! You can't just _assume—"_

"That's my ride, I got to go. Love you! And tell Eli to _keep his hands to himself_."

Oh God. I was officially mortified.

Eli was not only close enough to hear it, but Mom yelled it. The woman yelled on the damned phone like she knew that Eli could hear it.

I couldn't care less if she knew I was at Eli's, or that I spent the night, or anything.

"Did she just tell me to—"

"You heard _nothing,_" I glared, "where's my food woman?"

I was rewarded with a small chuckle and smile, in turn making me smile. He took his phone, leaving again. I fell against the bed, sighing and closing my eyes. I was wore-out. A small headache started in the back of my head, but it was nothing compared to the feeling between my legs. The dull throb was consistent, and the moment I moved; it hurt all over again.

After a short wait, Eli was back, balancing a plate on one forearm, holding a glass of milk in that hand; and holding my phone and his in the other.

A plate of toaster Ego waffles, a toaster strudel, and toast was sat in front of me. I laughed. "Is the toaster the only thing you know how to cook with?"

Eli tried to look grumpy, but he couldn't hide his smirk. "What," he sat next to me, placing the glass of milk on the night stand, "don't like it?"

"No, it's perfect," I stated before taking a bite out of the strudel. "You're not going to eat though?"

He shrugged, handing me my milk. I took a sip and cleared my throat, "Thanks Eli."

"No problem Emma." He was forcing his smile, I could tell by the way he wouldn't meet my eyes. Dread filled me again. How long was it going to take for Eli and I to get back on track?

That night was completely uneventful. I pretty much stayed in bed all day, Eli bringing me lunch and dinner. I was amused that he didn't use the toaster again. During the time in between he urged me to sleep, helped me to the bathroom when I needed to, and even offered for me to take a bath again. I declined to the latter, but it was sweet of him to think about it.

We didn't talk much, and when I started to doze to sleep, he was right beside me like the night before.

Sunday, it was something completely different.

I woke to my phone ringing. Me jumping awake and scrambling to get the phone woke Eli up. He was trying to wipe the sleep out of his eyes. I didn't even bother to see who was calling, but snapped the phone open. "Hello," my voice was groggy and rasped.

"Come open the damn door."

At that moment I felt more awake than ever.

_Fitz._

"Who is it," Eli's voice was caressing my other ear.

"Oh," Fitz laughed harshly, "you're with him? Come open the door so I can kick his ass again."

I bolted to Eli's window, from there not only could I see my own, but the front door from an odd angle. Low and behold Fitz was at the door, holding the phone in one hand and banging on the door with the other. His car was in the driveway, running.

Eli was behind me in an instant.

"I'm gunna fucking kill him." It was all I heard before his presence was gone.

"Oh, Goldsworthy thinks he's going to kill me, yeah?" Fitz taunted over the phone.

I slapped it shut and turned, Eli was no where. What if he went outside and Fitz saw him. Fitz would know I was over at Eli's...and that we were next door to be exact.

I bolted out the door, only to see Eli's feet at the bottom of the stairs and heading towards the kitchen. I took almost three at a time as I ran. "Eli, don't!" I was yelling at him, but he wouldn't stop.

The force I was putting on my legs was making me quiver, the pain was almost unbearable. Eli was almost to the front door, but I was quick enough. With the rest of the energy I had I launched myself off the ground and onto Eli's back.

We tumbled to the floor in a tangled mess. I cried out in pain when Eli's body crushed my hands and feet to the floor. He turned under me, eyes ablaze and furious. "What are you doing Emma," he yelled trying to bat me off.

"Don't! Please! I can't go home, and if you go out there he'll know where you live too. I won't be able to stay here either," I grasped his bare shoulders, shaking them violently.

"No Emma," he seethed, "he fucked with me long enough. And you were the last Goddamned straw!" He was pulling at my hands, off his body and grasping by the wrists tightly.

I tore them away, grabbing his face, bringing to closer to my own. "Elijah, if you care anything for me, anything at all—please don't do this. Not now," I whispered.

"Don't say that," his face softened, but his voice was fierce. "You know how much I care about you Emma."

I felt my lips trembling. "Then prove it," I wet my lips, tasting salt from tears. "Don't go out there. Come back upstairs with me.

"Play me something on your guitar, it'll take our minds off of it."

I didn't know what I was thinking when I said it. It was just something that was in his room and I didn't want him anywhere where Fitz could see us.

His face tilted towards mine, pressing his lips to my cheekbone. I glanced out the window, Fitz was getting inside his car and pulling out of my driveway.

"Come on," I grasped his hands in my own.

Eli carried me to his room again, I cuddled into the comforter and closed my eyes softly. The energy I had spent chasing Eli through the house spent me. I was about to sleep again—until I heard the strum of a guitar.

I didn't honestly think he'd play something, but it had been a frequent fantasy of mine—to have Eli play for me. To serenade me.

It was acoustic and staccato, a little upbeat, but simple. I opened my eyes to see him sitting in the corner, hands gliding over the neck and strings like they belonged there.

"Smiles and her laughter, it's the only thing that I've been waiting, for a time," his voice was marvellous. And I swear if I were on my feet, standing; I'd swoon and my knees would buckle right into the floor. It shook my body like the bass at a rock concert.

"Regardless of our distance and our hope, grows greater. Trapped by pretty eyes and letters for all time...the only thing that I've been waiting for."

Eli's fingers were still plucking away, his eyes focused on the end of his bed.

"I hope it's something worth the waiting. 'Cause it's the only time that I ever feel real."

His eyes slid close, head hung slightly and singing just as softly.

"Thunder storms could never stop me, 'cause there's no one in the world like Emma Lee."

Knees buckle and crash to the ground? More like I melt into the floor and make a puddle at his feet. At this point I knew for a fact Eli didn't write this, because it was clearly From First to Last. And instead of singing _Emily_ he sung _Emma Lee_. But the way he was nodding his head, eyes closed, and tapping the beat; it felt like he wrote it. I couldn't help but feel all the more on fire when my name tumbled from his lips.

Eli's eyes finally opened, finding mine.

"She's simple yet confusing. Her sparkling eyes make me weak at my words, they tremble. Days seem like years in this month of December. The winter, coldens me for I have yet to sleep. And never will I give up trying 'cause you're everything to me.

"I hope it's something worth the waiting. It's the only time that I ever feel real. 'Cause thunder storms could never stop me. 'Cause there's no one in the world like Emma Lee."

The strumming stopped, and I was on the brink of _something_.

"There's no one in the world like Emma Lee," he whispered.

I pushed myself up and off the bed and walked over to Eli. Some emotion was eating at me, and I couldn't describe it. It was like you feel mystical, like you didn't belong and in the back of your head you knew it. That reality was just a dream. And when you wake up, the unbelievable dreams you always had was reality. I felt light and weightless, almost _graceful_ by time I reached him.

I just woke up to the reality.

I was dreaming of an Eli and I, of a world in Toronto where we'd be normal teenagers and kiss and fool around.

Now, I woke up to the fact that it wasn't just normal teenagers and kiss and fool around. Emma Lee Zimmer just fell hard for Elijah Israel Goldsworthy.

Hard in love.

It wasn't like anything I've ever felt before. I was sad and happy all at once, devastated and glorious the next second. It was the raw emotion he held, the passion he sung, the lovely lyrics; it was all a recipe for a tired and confused Emma.

I disposed myself into his lap once he set the guitar on it's stand. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders I buried my fact in his chest. "It was beautiful," I whispered.

"Not as beautiful as you," he whispered back.

I snorted, pulling away to look him in the face. "That was not only cliché, but cheesy."

He didn't smile, nor did he look offended. His hand came up, his knuckle brushing against my cheek like he has done so many times before. "But God, it's so true," he murmured, looking at where his knuckle was just at, as if amazed.

The unexplainable feeling came back full force, and I crashed my lips to his. A whine escape my throat, and my lips were trembling all over again. I could feel his arm around me, palm and fingers of his hand holding my side and pulling me closer. His other hand was grasping the side of my face, it's palm and fingers engulfing my cheek, jaw, and temple. With that he pulled me away.

"You've never kissed me before," he smiled.

True; he's always kissed me. "Thanks Eli," I pulled myself against him in a hug, "for everything."


	12. Chapter 12

**Author Note::**

**Yeah, my laptop totally just broke, so chapters for ALL stories will be coming at a slow pace sadly. D:

* * *

**

The days passed easily with us laying in bed and sleeping. I don't think I've ever slept this much in my life. Though I couldn't think the same for Eli, I swear the boy could sleep forever if given the chance.

Suddenly it was Wednesday and someone was at Eli's door. The only reason I found out was because Eli's phone was ringing. I leaned over him and answered it. "Hello," I grumbled.

"Oh sorry, I think I might have got the wrong number," Clare's voice called from the other end.

"No," I tried to sound less irritated, "this is Eli's phone, he's just sleeping. I'll wake him up—"

"You don't have to do that," she rushed, "Alli and I are just outside his house and we were dropping off his homework, then we were going to go yours and do the same. I can give all of it to you then?"

Homework. God. I even forgot school existed.

"Uh yeah, give me a minute or two to get down there," I mumbled. With that I hung up. Trying my best to struggle to a standing point, I left the room without waking up Eli. I took the stairs one at a time, moving one foot to the next step, then the other following. I was already out of breath when I got to the door. After unlocking it, I opened it. Alli and Clare were both wearing their jackets and their hair was dusted with snow.

Stepping aside, they walked it, shivering and walking towards the kitchen counter.

"What happened to you two, you just stopped coming to school," Alli accused.

She didn't know? Did Johnny not tell her?

"What did you and Johnny talk about when he came over last weekend," I raised my eyebrow.

"That you were staying with Eli for the night and wasn't in the position to call your mom," she smirked. "So did you two do it or something?"

Clare's eyes widened, looking towards me as if I'd tell her differently. Which I was about to.

"No, we didn't do anything. I'm surprised Johnny didn't tell you."

"Have you been here since Friday night then," Clare asked herself. Not even looking up I nodded. Using the counter as leverage to help my limp as I went to the fridge. Grabbing the orange juice I limped back over to the counter. I did the same to get a glass. Again I was out of breath when I poured myself a glass. I didn't understand why I couldn't walk right, it's been almost a week.

"I didn't tell anyone," I sighed, "but I was seeing this guy, Mark."

Alli gasped, glaring at me. The look said _'We'd talk later'_ and her but also slight confusion; like she didn't know anyone named Mark. I looked to Clare, trying my best not to be mean towards her. The girl was a Saint, and she was never mean to me, but there was the underlining memory that she liked Eli.

"Honestly, and no offense Clare, I don't want to say it in front of you—but I will because Eli would tell you anyways when it got brought up. Friday I—"

"You _did_ have sex with him," Clare accused.

Rolling my eyes I continued, "Friday I met up with Mark to break it off with him because Eli and I were talking. I was supposed to see Eli before I went home that night, so we could talk some more and make things official.

"After school, I got into Mark's car, and before we left; I watched him beat the shit out of Eli. I couldn't stop it, because this bitch wouldn't let me out of the car, it's hard to explain.

"When we got to the ravine Mark started to talk like he wanted to see me more or something. It's another hard thing to explain. I didn't get the chance to talk to Mark about it, because all his friends were around and the ass hole was drunk to top it off. Eli was calling my phone like crazy because I was supposed to be home at six so we could talk.

"Finally I told Mark we needed to talk, and we went into an abandoned van. He was irritated with me, and my phone rang again. I ignored it, and Mark took it, listening to the message Eli left.

"I didn't know it until after we got to the ravine, but Mark is Fitz."

Alli's jaw dropped.

Clare's eyes widened, before looking away. "Shit," she muttered. I wanted to laugh, but I held it back. It wasn't something to do at the time.

"I heard you guys talk about him every once in a while, but I knew for sure he and Eli didn't like each other," I continued. Sighing and closing my eyes, _suck it up and spit it out_.

"Fitz raped me."

I didn't bother to see their reaction. I continued to talk. "Johnny brought me here and Eli's been taking care of me."

"Does Eli know Mark is Fitz," Clare looked oddly calm. I nodded, taking a sip of the orange juice. Thats when her mask of calm fell, and she looked just as broken as Eli did; _almost._

During the silence I started to leaf through the papers they brought. There was now three days of work to figure out, not to mention Thursday's and Friday's when we didn't or did go. I did need to go to school, because Mom would be suspicious when she got back and got a call from the school or something.

Clare turned and headed into the living room, probably up to Eli's room to wake him up. I wasn't the least bit surprised. I mean Clare was Eli's friend, and she probably took this situation as she needed to comfort Eli instead of me, because we weren't that close.

"Did you report it," Alli whispered. I shook my head.

"Good," she sighed, running her hand through her hair, "I hate to admit it, but you shouldn't. Eli and Fitz have been going at it since last year. I think if Fitz gets arrested one more time because of Eli; he'll go haywire."

Eli got Fitz arrested before, I had to bite back my laugh.

"But we should take you to the Plan Parenthood place or whatever it's called to see if you've caught anything or something. Get you tested."

It hit me like a ton of bricks. I hadn't even thought of that. What if Fitz gave me an STD or something? What if...what if I was pregnant?

"Oh shit," I whispered. The burning in my eyes was something I couldn't stop, and neither was the staggered breathing that came next. Tears were spilling over my cheeks and onto the counter. I didn't want to be pregnant, I didn't want to have to make the choice of having an abortion or not; I didn't want to think about it.

"Shhh," Alli rubbed my arm from across the counter, "it'll all be okay. I promise. I'll call Sav and he'll come pick us up and take you over right now."

"N-no,"I stammered, "I don't w-want to go t-today."

"I'll take you whenever you want to go hunny," she sighed, "I doubt it's something you want Eli to take you to."

She had that damn straight. I doubt Eli thought about the consequences either. It was hard enough to get him to look at me sometimes, and if I brought up going to get tested; he'd probably stop talking to me.

The thought itself made me erupt into more tears.

Everything is messed up because of Fitz.

No; because of my father. If it weren't for him putting a knife to my throat, it wouldn't have ever happened. But then I wouldn't have met Eli. I couldn't put the blame on anyone could I?

I heaved, placing my face in my arms on the counter and sobbed more. It felt good to let everything go, but it didn't stop the problems from piling up.

Two arms wrapped around my waist. I lifted my head and turned to be met with Eli. A sigh left me before I fell into his chest and sobbed harder. One hand started to rub my back and the other was holding my head to his shoulder. "It'll all be okay Emma," he whispered, "I promise."

After a while my sniffling faded to nothing. A growl erupted through my stomach.

Eli laughed, "Are you hungry?"

I wiped at my face one last time. "I can make something. It's fine."

"What time is it," I asked.

"About four," Alli replied. I limped over to the fridge again, opening it and finding almost nothing. A jug of milk, ketchup, and a jar of pickles.

Turning to Eli I smiled, "You want to go pick up some stuff?"

"Make a list," he said. "I'll go get dressed."

I took a pen that was laying on the counter, and a piece of paper that had a list of assignments on it. The half with nothing on it I tore off. "What are you guys hungry for," I asked Alli and Clare.

"Oh it's fine," Alli said.

"Look, it's easier to cook for four rather than two. What do you want?"

"What can you make?"

"Just about anything, it's not hard to cook."

"How about," Clare tapped her finger on her chin, "baked chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, rolls, and a pasta."

I laughed, starting to write it down. "You do know there is starch in all that minus the chicken, right?"

"Oh well," she responded smiling, "food is food, and I missed lunch."

Eli was back then, and he took the list from me and raising his eyebrows. "You know how to make all this?"

"Yes, and the sooner you stop talking and asking questions, the sooner you will get back and I can start," I stopped for a moment, "on second thought, Clare go with him. Eli will probably get the wrong kind of chicken or something."

He glared playfully at me before kissing my forehead and walking out the door to the garage with Clare. Alli raised an eyebrow at me.

"I know she's your friend," I sighed, "but I can't take her giving me that look much longer. "

"Well, I'm sorry to break it to you, but she's jealous that Eli picked you."

I shrugged, fighting the anxiousness in the pit of my stomach. Eli already told me how he felt about Clare, so I wasn't entirely worried. All I _was_ worried about was taking a shower. I'm pretty sure my hair was a grease ball. Eli had been taking showers when I had been sleeping, but when I was awake he was asleep, so I didn't think I could do it on my own. Now Alli was here if I needed help

"Do you mind if I take a shower," I asked.

"Go for it," she said, "I'll probably just do my homework."

I got to the other side of the counter, thinking about the trip I'll have to make to Eli's room to steal clothes. "I might need help," I mumbled, "getting in and out that is."

"You need it, you got it. Just give me a holler."

I had stole Eli's Aberlin shirt. It was almost tight on me. Hugging my chest in earnest. I also grabbed a pair of his jeans and boxers. They fit a little loosely around the waist, but the legs were too long. I folded the bottom over the ankle so that I wasn't stepping on them. They were tight around my butt though. Why did girls have them and not boys? The boxers were barely noticeable under the skinny jeans.

When I glanced in the mirror, I noticed that it was very _visible_ that I wasn't wearing a bra. Alli went over to my house and got one for me. By time I was re-changed and feeling refreshed, Eli and Clare were back, groceries in hand.

Eli looked me up and down as he was sitting the food on the counter. "Are those my clothes?"

"What," I tried to look innocent, "they fit me so nicely, there couldn't be anyway that they were yours."

I started to remove food from the bags. Eli grabbed instant mashed potatoes and Pasta-Roni. Grabbing the pots I'd need for the potatoes, pasta, and corn; I placed them on the stove and started the read directions.

So I started to cook, placing the chicken in the oven. It would take a while, so I didn't start anything else until it was almost done. Alli, Eli, and Clare were in the living room on the couch and floor doing homework. I joined them briefly, doing as much French work I could without the book.

We all watched TV and goofed around for another hour, but when I thought the chicken didn't have much time left; I started everything else. Clare helped me with measuring and stirring, which was nice considering there was a lot to do.

When it was all done I piled my plate along with everyone else, and braced myself to taste it. I've never cooked chicken before, but I knew how to from watching my Grandmother do it before. It all tasted amazing.

"This is really good," Alli said through a mouthful. I laughed, taking a sip of my water to hide it. Clare nodded and ate slowly like myself. Eli on the other hand; he was shoveling it into his mouth like there was no tomorrow.

"Eli," I poked him with my fork, "slow down or you'll choke. The food isn't going anywhere."

His head turned, eyes wide and mouth full. "I 'aven't ate 'dis gud since mum left," he mumbled.

Before I even finished eating Eli was done, and doing the dishes in the sink. It was already rounding on eight at this point.

Alli's phone rang, and she answered. A few moments later she hung up and stood up. "Johnny's here, he's going to give me a ride home. Come on Clare,"she started towards the door.

Finishing I got up and hugged Alli. "Can you take me to the clinic on Sunday," I whispered so that Eli wouldn't hear.

"Yeah, sure. Everything will turn out alright Layla."

Another pang went through me at that moment. I almost told her, told her my real name; but that was another long story for another long day. Clare was up and getting her coat on. "Thanks for the food Layla, it was delicious," Clare gave me a side hug.

"We'll see you two at school tomorrow, "I said as they shut the door behind them.

"Did I hear the word 'we' and 'school' and 'going' in the same sentence," Eli groaned sitting at the counter. I nodded, looking at all the other assignments we had left.

"I'm going to head over to my house and get some clothes, you coming with me," I asked.

Eli stood and shut the door I had half way open. "How about you just wear my clothes," he smiled, "you look good in them."

"I'm tired and ready for bed," I yawned.

Eli and I made our way upstairs, and I slept like never before.


	13. Chapter 13

In the morning it was a battle in itself to get Eli up and out of bed. I was able to walk around alright on my own without much trouble, but he still insisted when we walked out the door that he helps me to all my classes; and that I should skip Algebra. I agreed easily.

I wore his clothes again, smiling at how nice they fit me. Minus the boxers, that was quite awkward. I didn't want to say anything though, because I actually like wearing his clothes.

Once Morty was parked efficiently in the parking lot, I took a once around look. Fitz's car was nowhere to be found. Alli and Clare were actually waiting for us at the steps of the school. "Hey you two," Clare raised an eyebrow, "I see you finally saw the errors of your ways and wanted to indulge in education."

"I'd just feel bad if my mom came home Saturday to calls from the office about how I've been missing in her absence," I sighed, taking my text book out of Eli's hands. He was shouldering both our bags, and even insisted to carry my books. Not that I minded, because it was less for me. And Eli looked sweet, and was sweet, doing that for me.

Classes went by smoothly, lunch came and went with ease, and Fitz was nowhere to be found. Neither were his two friends that I had met last week.

Without questions we both walked into Eli's house and started our homework. I laying on my stomach on his bed, while he was on the floor writing and reading.

To say Friday passed much better would be a lie. We did the same things and came back to his house just to do more work.

Saturday morning when I woke, it was dreadful. It was the day that Eli and Emma playing house would end. Mom would be back today, and I needed to be over at my house and act like I had been there; and nothing was wrong.

Eli was gone from the bed, and I felt so alone. Though I forced myself to get up, I had to face the day that I wouldn't see Eli every time I turned around.

Sitting on the nightstand was a pair of jeans that looked of my own, a shirt, sweater, bra, and pair of underwear. A folded piece of paper lay on the top.

"_Emma,_

_I'm at your house doing my laundry; you wear a lot of clothes. I mean, why wear a new pair of jeans every day? I only have so many of those you know. Not to mention my _boxers._ Those have to be washed. :]_

_I am taking advantage of your soap and fabric softener too, so come over and give me some company. Hopefully make some awesome eggs. I'm hungry._

_-Eli."_

I smiled while my eyes scanned the paper. It was almost like things were normal.

_Almost._

I dressed, pushing the thought of Eli leering at my under garments to the back of my head.

Walking into my house, the blaring of Panic! At the Disco met my ears. Laughing some, I found Eli at the washer and dryer, leering at the clothes evilly.

"What are you doing," I asked.

He looked up throwing the clothes on the top of the washer, "I don't know how to do laundry."

"How have you been doing it," I inquired.

"All my clothes are generally black, it's that that difficult. But I decided to wash some of yours while I was at it; and you don't own all black clothes."

Indeed the clothes were various shirts and jeans that were indeed my own. Some underwear was set to the side, along with a few bras. "I didn't ask you to do it, and I don't really find comfort in the thought of you seeing my underwear and bras," I passed him and scrapped the undergarments into the basket below.

Eli smirked smugly, "Afraid I'll see the extravagant lacey stuff you wear under all your clothes?"

It was true; Victoria's Secret is my very best friend.

"I don't know, it messes with guys' minds," I sighed and started to separate the darks and lights of my own laundry. Eli watched from next to me, both of us silent as I did the job. Once a load was in and washing I turned to him and raised an eyebrow.

"Are you done with yours?"

"Yep, all done."

Together we walked into the living room. I sat on the dark brown loveseat in front of the television and motioned him to sit with me. "Might as well watch something," I sighed flipping on the T.V.

Twenty minutes into relaxation of _Moonlight_ my cell phone rang. It was setting in the kitchen. Sighing I got up to retrieve it.

"Hello?"

"Emma, it's Mom."

"Hey Mom, where you at?"

I heard her sigh, something hadn't gone right. "I'm getting a taxi now. I'll be at the house in a couple hours. The trial didn't go as planned."

"What happened?"

"It's going to continue on another day. It's too stressful to go over on the phone hunny. I'll have to go back in another two weeks."

"Okay I guess we'll talk about it when you get home then."

"Thank you. Is Eli over?"

As far as I knew, Mom didn't know about Eli's knowledge of the trial or anything for that matter.

"Yeah he is," I sighed on the phone, "we got something to tell you. And I think all three of us should sit down and talk about everything."

"Don't tell me you two had sex when I was gone."

"No! No we didn't do anything," I groaned out in frustration. It brought me back to thinking about what happened with Fitz. I had decided long ago I wouldn't tell her about that. It was hard enough day after day to fight off Eli's questions on whether I was going to press charges or not.

"Okay, thank God. We'll talk later, love you."

"Love you too Mom."

I hung up the phone and ran a hand through my hair. Everything was going to shit. She'd have to leave again? The thought itself was sort of appealing for Eli and I, because in two weeks hopefully we'd be able to be in our relationship like we were supposed to. To be able to be alone with him like I had been. Minus the rape situation.

I started towards the living room again. Eli was sitting and flipping though the channels with the remote. When I was in the room again I leaned against the door frame and looked at the T.V. Eli turned smiling, patting the spot where I had been sitting in efforts to get me to come sit again. I smiled too, already starting over there.

Suddenly he froze, turning and looking at the spot where his hand was. Slowly it rose so it was in both our line of vision.

It was coated in red. Blood.

A look of horror crossed his face, and one of confusion for my own.

On my body's own accord, it turned. My head turning as I bent over slightly to see.

Sure enough red blood coated it. My heart picked up, panic flooding me. I was bleeding. I was bleeding _down_ _there. _What did this mean? Starting to breath hard, I felt my lip tremble.

Eli was up and over in a matter of seconds, pulling my shoulders into his hands.

"Emma we need to take you to the hospital. We need to go now," he breathed out hard.

When was the last time? About three or four weeks. Relief.

"Eli," I put a hand on his own shoulder. Smiling softly through the tears that was already flooding over my cheeks. "It's fine. This is good."

"How the fuck is bleeding good Emma Lee," he seethed. Eyes aflame, he made a weird rumbling noise in the back of his throat.

I grabbed his face in both of my hands. "Eli, this is great. I didn't want it to happen. In front of you if anything, but it's my period."

"Your…what," his face fell, almost looking at a lost.

"I'm not pregnant Eli."

Just the news itself was enough to make me smile, one with a small laugh and more tears. I wasn't pregnant. Fitz didn't get me pregnant. That was one of the things that worried me the most.

Eli's face blank, his hands left my shoulders.

All at once they grasped my face, pulling it to his. In a sort of desperation, his lips attacked mine, harsh and demanding the affection his was dealing. Before I could start to kiss back, or process what was happening, he trailed his lips in a sloppy manner across my face and onto my cheeks.

"You don't know," he panted, breathing and kissing my face more, "how happy," he found my lips again for a moment before pulling away, "that makes me."

"What would you have done if I was," I hated to ask, but somehow I wanted to know. Even if it wasn't relevant, I wanted to know.

Eli hugged me to his chest, breathing in my hair and rubbing his hand up and down my back. His breath hot in a whisper, "I've thought about it."

"You have?" My voice trembled, a new load fresh set of tears flowing down my face.

One of his hands clutched my opposing side, the other holding my head to his shoulder. "I wouldn't love it. I thought I'd hate you honestly. But when it came down to it, I'd tell myself every night for the last week you were. That in the morning you'd find out and tell me.

"I'd cry and throw a fit. Tried to think about how I'd be a complete dick and throw you out because you were carrying his child. I thought about how'd I'd ask you to have an abortion, how I'd take you and everything. Anything and everything to get rid of it.

"And finally I realized I couldn't do any of those things. I wouldn't be able to have you leave my life. Maybe I couldn't deal with the fact, so we could remain friends. I couldn't ask you to have an abortion. It's wrong and horrible of me to ask of you.

"I would have taken care of you and it. The baby would have still been a part of you. I would have taken care of both of you in hopes that one day I could get over my differences and continue to have an interest with you like I do now."

If I thought I was crying before; I was wrong. Any time in my life that I had been crying before was watery eyes compared to this.

I cried like the day that Eli and I cried on his couch after Fitz raped me.

Here and now I sobbed, legs buckling while we both melted into the floor. My eyes crinkled to the point where I started to get a headache on the spot. Snot was running into my mouth disgustingly and my hands were aching because I was clutching his shirt so tightly. Even my knuckles were white.

I don't know what shocked me more. The fact that Eli was being so honest about it with me, or the fact that he practically said he planned to be around for a long time. My heart constricted and released with each staggering breath.

The words wanted to come out like word vomit. I wanted to taste them, to test them and see how they would hear flowing from my lips.

I was about to tell Eli 'I love you'.

Lips trembling, I pulled away so I could look him in the eyes when I told him.

Before I got to do that, he grabbed my faced and crushed our lips together again.

The kiss was frantic and desperate, loving and demanding. I tasted salt and Eli's lips through the whole thing. Soon his lips left mine to flow down my throat breathlessly. My hands were still on his shirt, grasping the fabric like my life depended on it.

Eli's strong arms pulled me closer to himself, lifting me off the ground slightly as to pull me to his lap.

I pushed him away slightly, forcing his lips to leave my neck.

Jade eyes met mine, questioning and confused. Swollen red lips were parted slightly.

The sticky awkwardness between my legs made me wince. "Maybe I should clean up first, and then we can…continue this later," I asked.

Eli helped me up. I ran upstairs to my room to grab a new set of clothes. I took a quick shower, scrubbing furiously at my legs and behind.

After cleaning up and getting dressed I head back downstairs. I'd have to clean the couch before Mom got back, otherwise she'd blow up in my face.

When I got downstairs, I was utterly shocked to see Eli already scrubbing at the couch with vigor. It brought tears to my eyes yet again. Eli was coming up to be too perfect, to be too much of a dream guy.

"Eli don't," I urged helping him up and walking him to the kitchen sink. His hands were covered in blood. While he washed his hands I ringed out the rag he was using and used it to wipe at the couch a last time.

He had the whole thing already cleaned; the rag was bloodless when I pulled it away.

Joining Eli at the sink, I also washed my hands. Sighing when I was finished. Turning to him I smiled softly, getting on my tip toes to press my lips to his briefly, loving the feeling. "Thank you," I murmured, "you didn't have to do that. I didn't realize how truly perfect you were until this last week."

Our eyes were searching each others.

"I want to say I don't deserve you," I sighed. He was too good for me.

"Don't say it then."

"I wasn't going to," I smiled softly, "didn't I mention I'm a very greedy girl?"

Eli smiled before kissing me again. I sighed in content, letting the kiss take me to a place, where until recently, only my dreams could.


	14. Chapter 14

When my mom walked in the door thirty minutes later, it wasn't hard to tell her about Eli and I. Though I wasn't surprised at her _not_ being surprised about it.

The night didn't go by quite as nicely.

I had to go back with her in two weeks for the second trial. The only reason that she was allowed to come back was to snatch me. Without my testimony the judge doesn't believe that they even have a case since Mom's evidence of bruises faded over time. Even healed the scar was still visible were the knife laid against my throat.

I didn't want to go. I didn't want to go back to Florida, even if my life depended on it.

"Can Eli come, please," I begged my mother.

Surprisingly she said yes, if only Eli's parents were okay with it.

I'd be surprised if they didn't let him in all truth.

Walking Eli to the door, I held his hand tightly. "Two weeks, you're coming with me; even if I have to kill a man."

He laughed, kissing my head briefly, "Do I get to choose the man that shall die?"

Fighting my own smile I nodded, biting my lip. "Any damn man you want—except Johnny Depp; he's sexual man chocolate."

A glare came my way. "Really now?"

"Yes, completely and utterly _my _sexual man chocolate."

Eli smirked, leaning close to press our lips together. The sensation was almost enough to make me moan in pleasure. "He doesn't get to touch you," he whispered against my lips, hand slipping to grasp my bottom, "you're _mine._"

Things started to go back to normal around my house and at school—somewhat. The consular switched me out of the math class I had with Fitz, because I complained about always being late to my next class across the school—which was somewhat true. I didn't get any new classes, just two of them changed hours.

Clare wasn't as _needy_ towards Eli like she normally was. And when I say needy, I mean as she acts like _he _needs _her_. Sometimes it was like she would baby him.

I noticed this change at the beginning of the week. They were talking quietly when I walked up to the lunch table. Both abruptly stopping when I approached. I wasn't really worried.

Then again; Alli said for me to be worried over Clare's jealously.

For every day for the rest of that week the same thing happened, again, again and again.

Inside I was feeling slightly frightened, because I felt like Eli and I just got over the Fitz speed bump, and we didn't need a Clare one.

Could he possibly be having second thoughts, me having baggage because of Fitz? Did he come to realize that Clare _is _actually what he wanted because I was..._broken?_

Friday rolled around, and it was evident that I was acting oddly around Eli.

Every time he looked towards Clare, I would get entirely quiet.

Every time we were alone, anywhere and kissing, I'd stop it short to a peck; I didn't want to get to into it with all these questions buzzing around in my mind.

Every time Clare called while we were together I _left_.

It was very obvious.

At school on Friday, the same thing happened. Clare and Eli were whispering at the table, stopping when I got there. Of course she was smiling, like she always was. It was the pleased kind of smile, like she knew all along she was the smartest kid in school, and no one believed her.

That I wouldn't doubt.

Just as I was sitting down and about to bite into my chicken sandwich, my phone vibrated.

_Text Message: Mom_

_had 2 go 2 work b hom 3 u b hom 8 luv u_

I sighed, sliding it back in my pocket.

"What was it," Eli asked.

"Mom, telling me she has to work a twelve hour shift tonight."

Eli put his milk back on the tray, smiling at me from across the table. "Want to come over then? We haven't hung out in a while."

A smile made its way up my face, "Eli, we hung out almost every day this week."

"You always disappear when I leave you alone for a second," he furrowed his brows. "Tonight you're all mine babe."

So he _had_ noticed I had been giving him the slip.

"Okay, I'll see you after classes then."

Another long boring day...

After school I found myself at Eli's house, both of us on the couch in the living room watching TV and throwing popcorn around. It continued on to midnight, time flowing right on by like old times. Nothing was bogging my mind down, because Clare hadn't called, no one was talking about her; and we couldn't _not_ laugh at Moonlight, the show about a vampire that was a detective.

That was just funny itself.

I laughed weakly, flopping on the armrest of my side of the couch. My face felt hot from all the laughing. Eli was on the other end doing the same.

Only a few minutes had passed before he crawled to my side and right on top of me. Before I knew it, his lips were on mine, sucking up my last laugh. Without wanting to, I broke away, looking towards the TV. Everything I had been worrying about all week came back to mind.

"What's wrong," Eli murmured, his hand coming to pull my chin to face him.

"I—" I stopped myself. "It's just...what have you and Clare been talking about all week?"

His brows knitted, looking completely confused. "What?"

"Every time I come to lunch you two are whispering, and when I get there you two stop."

His eyes opened wider, like he understood what I was talking about. First he looked away, then back to me; away again.

"I—I'm afraid to talk to you about it."

Chest constricting, I let out a soft gasp. Everything I had been thinking this week suddenly felt...real. Really real.

"I think I should go home," I murmured, trying to slide out of Eli's grasp.

I didn't want to be here. Near him. It was almost torture. I came to the conclusion only a week ago that I loved this boy, and suddenly it felt like he didn't want it.

"Why have you been avoiding me all week," he held me in place, looking almost angry.

"Because you've been talking to Clare a lot," I whispered.

"Really," he laughed harshly, "I didn't think you'd be so jealous that I can't have friends."

I sat up, rubbing my eyes because I knew I was about to cry. The hot stinging was almost painful.

"I don't care if you're friends with her. But when I see you two whispering closely, stopping when I'm there, and you're so distracted by her when you're on the phone and don't notice I leave; well I start to wonder if you're regretting your choice."

Something was lifted off my chest, like the tightness what was grasping it was somewhat lifted, only a painful hollowness left behind.

Immediately Eli's eyes softened, hands coming up to cup my face. "No," he murmured, "that's not it at all Emma."

"Then what is it then Eli, because I'm still in the dark, and I'm not finding any light."

"I've been talking to Clare about you. How to go about our relationship; advice."

"Advice on what?"

His face turned into a grimace. "I just...I care about you too much to do anything to hurt you you know Emma. I was wanting Clare to help me look for signs."

All the mixed signals were giving me a slight headache. The tiredness I was feeling wasn't helping any either.

"I don't understand what you're talking about," I muttered.

"I'm talking about you. I need to know when you're ready, ready for something that isn't sex, but more than kissing."

The heart inside my chest was starting to speed up, to the point where it was pounding. Eyes wide open and unbelieving.

"I—What," I asked.

Finally he turned to face me, jade eyes dark. Like the few times we had been together in my bed kissing.

"After what happened," he muttered, "I didn't want to push you too far. But all those times before call to me Emma, when you're sleeping in my arms, when you're kissing me, when I'm sleeping. Those times haunt me, tease and torment me to the point where I'm almost insane."

"So why talk to Clare about it, you're not dating her," I whispered.

His eyes looked into my own, into my _soul_ and heart.

"You thought I was cheating on you with Clare or something didn't you?"

"I didn't know what to think Eli..."

Biting his lip he looked away again, hands sliding down to hold my sides while he was almost sitting on my lap. "It's hard to talk to you Emma. I look at you and...the thoughts come back. They're thrashing in my head to escape to my nerves and commit the acts. I know Clare doesn't know much about being in that kind of situation, but I didn't feel comfortable talking to Alli about it."

"I told you Eli, normal is fine," I whispered, "but to me, you whispering to Clare in the middle of the lunch room and her smiling like she _won_ isn't what I call normal."

Within seconds he pounced, lips crushing to mine in a hunger, a _need_ that I couldn't feed and he couldn't control. Our lips were desperate and thriving, and each of us were panting into the other's mouth.

"Clare," he panting down my neck, "didn't win _shit_. You're the one I want to do this with, only you."

A moan ripped through my chest, his teeth grazing my skin in search. My hands grasped his sides, fingers slipping underneath to touch his stomach. Only once did I touch it there, and I wanted to touch it again and again and again. My whole body was aflame, not even thinking about what we were talking about.

Eli's lips left my neck. Sitting up straight, he pulled off his shirt.

I drank him in, biting my lip, loving every second of it.

I sat up to kiss him, not denying my hands the travel they wanted to commit. They traced every muscle he had. Nails scratching lightly across his hot flesh.

His hands were under my shirt, touching my sides, stomach, and back. Both were blazing hot, but the coldness of his rings added more tingling affects that sent me haywire. Noises were leaving my lips every few seconds.

I didn't stop him as the shirt slipped up over my head.

He didn't stop himself from kissing a trail from my neck and onto my chest. It felt incredible.

Suddenly he bit on my collarbone, eliciting a high gasp from myself, back arching towards the ceiling.

Another wave of tightness left my chest, like everything was loose.

I opened my eyes, lazy and panting.

Eli removed my bra.

It was too far. We needed to stop before it got out of—.

I moaned loudly, gasping for air.

Eli's hands had slipped over onto my chest, each holding a breast in their possession.

"Elijah," I choked out his name. Heat pooled in my stomach, between my legs; both of which were rubbing together furiously, to get rid of the feeling. It set me at ease, for the moment, but with Eli's hands moving and caressing my chest ever so gently, the pleasure still course through my veins and sung with sighs.

From between my legs, he kissed down my neck and in between my breasts, onto my stomach. Never once his hands left my chest. At my navel he open mouth kissed it, slipping his tongue into it, causing me to jerk towards him more.

My fingers were clutching his hair tightly, knuckles white.

Oh God, it was amazing.

A crash rang through the living room. I screamed, bringing my hands away from his hair and my arms to cover myself. Immediately Eli dropped onto me, holding his weight but covering me completely. The world started to spin and fall at the same time.

When I opened my eyes, I realized that the couch flipped backwards. Eli was getting up, looking over the couch.

Something that sounded like gun shots rang through the house repeatedly. I screamed again, covering my head with my arms. The noise didn't stop.

"It's fire crackers, you're okay," Eli was pulling my arms away from me. I watched as he reached over and grabbed the closest shirt, being his own, and pushing it in my arms. "Put that on."

He was gone and back again in seconds, another round of fire crackers going through the house.

In his hand was a wooden bat, a bat that he handed to me.

"Stay here, if anyone comes in, protect yourself," he whispered before kissing my forehead. Before standing up he looked from me to the bat. "You do know how to use that, right?"

I nodded numbly, watching as he tip toed through the glass and to the front door.

Silence.

"You fucking bastard," Eli screamed, "you're going to die tonight!"


	15. Chapter 15

Who's going to die tonight? All at once I felt myself shake. Quickly I stood, holding the bat tight and tip toeing through the glass and to the front door.

It was pitch black out, save for the street lamp a good hundred feet away. A car was parked in Eli's driveway, the driver door hanging open. My eyes scanned the front yard, and it wasn't hard to make out the two figures that were rolling entwined in the grass. Eli was on top of the other male, throwing fist after fist into his face.

The guy under him rolled, forcing Eli to the ground. A gasp fled my lips when I realized who it was.

Fitz.

Breathing labored, I pressed my free hand to my lips.

I don't know how I was supposed to feel, seeing Fitz trying to punch Eli; but I felt kind of relieved. I mean at least it wasn't a serial killer or anything; just a rapist.

Oh God, that's almost as bad—why am I relieved over this?

Fitz's arm finally broke free, cocking back and slamming into Eli's temple. As the skin on skin contact happened, it felt as if the wind was knocked out of me. Eli's arms fell to the ground, his body unmoving.

"ELI!" I screamed, pressing my hand to my chest and heaving hard. The salt from tears met my mouth, my nose sniffling quickly.

Fitz's head jerked up, his eyes meeting mine. He was up and running towards me. I didn't have time to move or react when he wrapped his arms around my waist and fell to his knees. There was nothing I could do but cry harder, looking at Eli and feeling like shit. Was he dead?

"Layla," Fitz sobbed into my stomach, "I'm so fucking sorry. I was drunk. It's not an excuse, but—but I couldn't help it! When I heard that message...I-I just thought you were using me to make him jealous! I wanted to show you I was better than him, and you were telling the truth. I'm so so sorry."

The words froze me to the bone. I couldn't help but shiver. It was all happening to fast. Over his stock of hair I saw Eli's limp body. His head twitched, thank God. I breathed in, starring at him and ignoring Fitz crying into my midsection.

Eli's head moved, slowly and groggy before his eyes fell on me. They widened before his jaw tightened and he scrambled up.

"I'm sorry Layla," Fitz was crying again. When his eyes rose up to meet mine, I couldn't help but tell they were red and irritated; honest tears falling from them. "I loved you, so much."

If I thought I couldn't move before, it was nothing compared to now. My grip on the bat loosened, it soon falling from my hands. Only the sound of the wooden bat hitting the cement met my ears over my pounding heart. My breath left me for a second, my legs shaking fiercely when given the chance.

"Let her the fuck go Fitzgerald," Eli roared from behind Fitz. I looked up, looking at his stormy green eyes. They were full of hatred and anger.

Fitz released me, turning on Eli and throwing fists all over again.

On the ground I saw blood.

The site made me turn and vomit right next to me. I tore into my pocket, fishing out my phone. Call the police, get them to break up the fight. Something, anything; just stop it.

Was it 911 in Canada?

I stopped, what was I supposed to do.

Instead of thinking anymore I called Alli, trying to fight back the tears.

"Hello," Alli's groggy voice answered after a few rings.

"A-alli. I need your help, please," I trembled.

"Layla, hunny what's wrong," she asked, sounding more alert.

"It's F-fitz, he's here at Eli's and they're fighting! I need the cops, and I don't know what number to call. Please call the cops."

"Okay, Clare, Johnny and I are coming over, right now."

Without bothering I threw my phone, pushing my hands to my face and sobbing at the sight. Fitz was beating Eli, and Eli was grunting and cursing while throwing his own attacks. They weren't on the ground anymore, but purely standing up and trying to strangle each other it seemed.

I stood on shaky legs, I had to stop it. I was scared, tired, and almost completely depressed at this point. The snow bit into my feet as I tore through the yard. Without thinking I launched myself on the nearest back, feeling my momentum taking both of us down.

When Eli's scent hit my nose, I was comforted to know I landed on him and not Fitz; but I didn't feel comforted when the wind was knocked out of me for a second time tonight. Air fled me, leaving me gasping for breath and pain in my chest before Eli rolled off of me.

"Shhh, calm down and take deep breaths," Eli was murmuring in my ear. He jerked above me, causing me to gasp out when his fingers sought purchase on my skin. "Knock it off Fitz," he snarled, "she's hurt."

At this moment I could hear car tires on the road. Red and blue lights reflected off the white house, also showing the words 'thief' and 'emo bitch' in black spray paint.

"Everybody up and separate, now," a deep commanding voice called loudly. A smile was brought to my lips when Eli started to help me up. Another set of tires were crunching the cement moments later.

Alli came into view first, rushing over to me before Johnny and Clare calmly walked over with concern written on their faces.

"What seems to be the problem folks," the officer spoke again, shining a flashlight in my face.

I wrapped my arms around Eli, looking over at Fitz. Another officer was grabbing him by the arm to prevent him from coming our way.

"That guy over there vandalized my house and broke one of my windows," Eli began to rub my shoulders soothingly.

With that one statement the police started to escort Fitz into the car and talking to Eli and I with notepads and paper.

I told them about the situation with my Mom and I, where we lived and such, and what I could remember of what happened just now, which wasn't a lot except for what was happening before the window was broke. No way in hell was I going to tell them about that.

"Okay Miss, I'm assuming you're a minor," the officer asked.

I nodded, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

"How old are you?"

"Sixteen."

"... and you'll be seventeen when?"

"In August," I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to call your mother and have her come home now so we can speak to her about matters."

Damn it all to hell. She was going to find out I was over at Eli's late at almost one something in the morning and get really pissed at me.

Glancing over at Eli, I could see that he was more calm than before, Clare at his side rubbing his back. I was to tired to be pissed or annoyed at this point at her. At the car on the curb, Johnny had his arms around Alli, keeping her warm. They looked peaceful and cute together, that brought a smile to my face at least.

Making my way over, I shivered, taking my hands and rubbing my arms.

Alli opened Johnny's coat that he wore and she was inside in his arms, letting me inside too. A weak laugh met my lips. It felt kinda weird to be hugging both of them at once in a sandwich and having Johnny wrap his arms around us.

Fifteen minutes passed, and Eli was still talking to the officers. Clare still by his side like a lost child.

Finally Eli was released from questioning, walking over just as my mom's car pulling in our driveway about fifteen feet away. Just damn great...

Clare stood next to the Emma, Alli, and Johnny sandwich when Eli gently pried me out of it. Mom's car door slammed, her heels clicking on the cement and silence when she hit the grass. She didn't bother talking to me, but going straight to the officer and begun to ask questions.

Eli pressed me to his body, allowing me to suck up his warmth, but I still shivered none the less.

He chuckled, pulling away to look down. "I'm starting to like my shirts on you more and more."

The outside air made it very... _nippy_ for myself.

We all stood against Johnny's car, huddled together keeping warm while the police started to slowly leave with Fitz. My mom came over to us, looking worn out.

"E—"

"Ms. Smith," Eli cut in, "it wasn't _Layla's _fault. I asked her to stay a little bit later than usual so we could finish a movie, and we fell asleep."

Mom seemed to straighten up at his words, giving him a soft smile as a sort of thanks in reminding her that we weren't exactly alone. Calling me Emma instead of Layla would be confusing.

"Layla, we'll talk about this in the morning." Her eyes cut to Johnny, Alli, and Clare. "Were all of you over at Eli's, and not to be rude but _who_ are you?"

Alli's arm shot out of beneath the coat, shaking my mom's. "I'm Alli Bandarhi," she smiled sweetly, "and this is my boyfriend Johnny Dimarco, and our friend Clare Edwards. Clare and I were at my house when Layla called. She didn't know how to get a hold of the police here. Johnny picked us up and brought us over."

Mom softened even more if possible. "That was very kind of you. Thank you for being there for Layla. If you'd all like to stay at our house, I wouldn't have a problem with it. I don't feel at ease with you kids driving around this late at night."

Eli wound his arm around my shoulder while I hit my chest with my crossed arms.

"Even Eli, Mom," I smiled knowing she wouldn't deny him that. She didn't know it, but Eli and I spent the night together more than once.

"Sure, why not, as long as you cook breakfast in the morning."

"Oh I second that," Eli grinned, pressing his lips to my cheek.

"Fooooood," Johnny groaned, dropping his face into Alli's neck.

I was still a bit shook up and cold, but I couldn't stop from feeling a bit humorous at the moment.

"Yeah whatever, I'll cook, but all of you have to go pick out what you want and buy me ice cream."

"Really," Clare laughed, "eating ice cream in the morning, for breakfast?"

"You all have coffee," I glared, "and I have ice cream. Capeesh?"


	16. Chapter 16

Another week passed, much more pleasing than the last to say in the least. Eli and I hung out more, no more worrying on my part I assure you, and it was nice. No we didn't get hot and heavy again, but there wasn't really any time.

It was mid-November and we were packing summer clothes for the trip to Florida for the case. I was excited, because Eli was coming with us, and to get away from the Fitz drama and just being away. Sure I was going to testify against my dad, but it didn't seem to bother me much. I mean, I was more scared of Fitz at this point in time rather than my own father.

Before we knew it, we were on a plane after school Friday and to Florida we went.

"Can you believe it," I sighed resting my head on Eli's shoulder on the plane ride, "we can go swimming, sit around in the hotel room and watch _American_ shows that you will love and—"

"Emma," Eli laughed, "I know, it'll be great, but there won't be much time for that stuff, don't you think? I mean, would it really be wise to run around the town with your Dad out of jail and what not?"

"The trial is on Sunday morning, it'll be done and over with Sunday afternoon. That leaves tonight and Saturday for fun and play. We're going to the beach rather you like it or not," I glared.

He leaned closer, so he was whispering low and huskily; "Do you got a sexy bikini to wear for me to persuade me to go to the beach Ms. Emma?"

Shivering, I elbowed him in the chest. "Maybe," I smiled, "but it's strictly for hotel use."

His eyebrows furrowed, "Why would there be a pool at a hotel in Florida?"

"I wasn't talking about a hotel pool," I replied closing my eyes and sighing.

Eli groaned softly. "I'm so going to kill you for that."

Later that day we landed.

Mom, Eli, and I found a taxi, and we took it straight to the hotel where we were checked in as the Smiths. I was humming with energy, loving the fact that the weekend would be spent in Florida rather than Canada. Not to mention Eli was with us. I just couldn't get over that tidbit.

"Okay guys," my Mom sighed, wiping sweat off her forehead. "I'm going to Aunt Mildred's for a couple of hours."

"Aunt Mildred's," I asked. Since when did I have an Aunt Mildred?

"She's Grandma Karen's sister. Aunt Milly? I'll be back before midnight," she walked towards the door of our hotel room. Turning, she pointed at Eli, "And Mr. Goldsworthy should be in his room when I'm back. No hanky panky."

"Of course Ma'am, I'm grateful you brought me along, I wouldn't mess that up," he smiled from the couch.

Mom smiled and nodded once, "Go to the beach, get something to eat, have fun. Sunday's going to be tough."

Once the door closed, I got up and started to search my bags. I was in pants and already sweating from the climate change. Eli was still in pants too, but I doubt he'd be changing his clothes anytime soon. When I helped him pack, I didn't see one pair of shorts. Grabbing a pair of my own, a tank top, and my swim suit I popped into the bathroom to change.

My swim suit was a bikini of course. Black and lime green zebra print. Easy to notice under my white tank top, but it was completely hidden under my denim shorts.

I breathed a sigh of relief when I got out, basking in the new freedom of skin.

Eli smirked from the couch, green eyes taking in my new attire.

"I think we should buy you shorts," I grabbed my bag, hefting it over my shoulder as I slipped my sandles on. Eli groaned before getting up, complaining about shorts and how his legs were disgustingly pale and hairy.

"Just shut up and come, okay," I grabbed his hand, and we were off and out of the hotel room.

First we ventured to Pac Sun, where I thought Eli would like a pair of cargo shorts. After I forced him to try on twelve different pair, we left the store. And it wasn't until we passed Hot Topic that I slapped my forehead in frustration. Why hadn't I thought of that first? Eli's brows knitted when I dragged him by our entwined hands into the store. A familiar musk met my nose, one that set me slightly on edge. I've been to this store once or twice, but I always felt uneasy doing so.

Eli on the other hand... well he was taking in the clothes and everything else like a little kid in a toy store. Jade green eyes wide and mouth open in awe, a slow smile made it's way up onto his face.

"This place is amazing," he whispered. Then _I _was the one being dragged.

After an hour, Eli had built up seven pairs of shorts, three pairs of pants, eight shirts, a few necklaces, a couple rings, and bought me a Ice Nine Kills purse I hadn't saw until he put it in my hands. Where the money came from, I have no idea, but I couldn't help but smile at his happiness.

"I'm hungry," I sighed, throwing the rest of my stuff in my new purse before slipping the old one into Eli's shopping bags. He had already changed into the new gray checkered pair of shorts, and his white band t-shirt of a band I had never heard of. It was different seeing him in something other than black, but I still drooled a little bit.

"Then let's eat," he smiled before slipping my hand into his.

A surge of tingles went through me. Yes, I know that we've gone pretty far, but something simple as holding my hand still sent me into a fit of giggles. Now that I think about it, Eli and I have never held hands. We made our way to the food court, my mouth watering a little bit at the thought of an ice cold fountain drink and some fries.

Burger King.

"Eli—"

"I know," he cut me off, pulling my hand in that direction, "I saw it to."

In seconds we were in line for Burger King. Eli managed his two giant shopping bags onto one arm while he dug in his back pocket for his wallet. "What do you want to eat? I'll get it while you go get a table for us."

I told him quickly about the onion rings that I wanted and the fact that I was starving for a Crispy Chicken sandwich. My mouth watered all the way across the food court while I looked for a vacant table. Within ten minutes Eli met me there and we started to dig into the grub we had scored.

"So what do you plan on doing when you graduate this year," I asked playing with my onion rings.

Eli swallowed and took a sip of his Cola, smiling the entire time. "A writer doesn't need college to write well; it just looks good. I already applied at the community college in Toronto." My heart swelled with joy at the thought, being close to Eli was one of my favorite things.

"What about you kid," he asked before shoving more fries in.

"I don't know what I want to go to college for anyway," I sighed. There wasn't really anything I was spectacular at.

"You'll figure it out."

We ate in silence after that, and it wasn't bad. It was actually sort of nice. And I enjoyed it, because I could savor my onion rings. Eli watched me smiling, and I couldn't help but smile back. Everything was going fantastic.

"Emma Zimmer!"

I could feel every muscle in my body lock up, every hair on my body stand on end.

Eli looked to our right, a look of confusion lining his features. Fuck. My. Life. Breathing quickening, I hunched down lower, hoping against hope that I could hide myself.

A lanky hand laid itself on the table, which connected to an equally lanky arm. And that too was connected to an equally lanky person. Said person happened to have the same face as my cheating bastard of an ex.

Stephen.

"You just disappeared babe, it's been like three months, where did you go," his cocky voice was always the same.

Taking a few deep breaths I calmly turned to him, "Skeeve off."

He laughed, putting his hand on my shoulder, running his hand down my back and leaning closer to me.

"Excuse me, but my girlfriend and I were having lunch. Please excuse yourself and leave," Eli looked a bit ticked off. His pale ringed fingers slid across the table to grasp my open hand, entwining our fingers as I shrugged off Stephen's hand.

The latter straightened up, glaring at the two of us. "She's my girl bro."

"Yeah, three months ago, and it lasted a month. You also didn't have a problem plowing into my best friend with your dick the night I left either!"

Suddenly everything got really quiet. Did I seriously scream that out loud? I could feel the heat take over my face. And I was entirely surprised to see the same reaction on Stephen's face.

The glare that was directed towards me was just as equally pissed of when it flitted over Eli's face. "Good luck with that one man, legs don't open even for a piss," Stephen seethed before stalking off towards another direction. Suddenly the appetite for onion rings fell through and I wasn't hungry at all anymore. Eli was in the process of getting up after recovering from the insult thrown at myself. He didn't take long to pack our food into paper bags and gently urging up out of my seat.

Even seeing Stephen again, I was still shocked. What was I kidding myself? There was a life I had here in Florida, that got left behind while I went to Canada to create a false one; one that wasn't going to make me completely forget everything that had happened.

On the walk back to the hotel Eli remained silent. Did he take what Stephen said seriously? He shouldn't. Even if it was true, Eli wasn't the type to care. Sure he had his small moments where he is needy, but I doubt he'd leave me if I wouldn't give it up to him...right?

When we got back to the room, Eli tried to get me to finish the food I hadn't finished. I neglected it softly by putting it in the room mini fridge.

"Emma, just forget about it okay? Let's... go to the beach? I've never been to one before," he murmured while holding my hand. I nodded numbly, trying to hold back the negative thoughts that wanted to escape wildly into my mind.

"Okay," I stood up, pulling him behind me. "But the moment girls start drooling over you, we're leaving mister," I poked him in the chest with a small smile. "If any bitch gets your beach virginity, it's this one."

A devilish smile coated his lips, causing me to blush immensely. He brought his hands to my waist, pulling me almost chest to chest while his hands dove under my tank top to play with the strings that tied my bikini top together. "You," he murmured trailing his lips across my neck and down my throat, "just told me you're going to have sex with me at the beach. Do. Not. Tease."

The shaky legs that were holding me up suddenly gave out, but Eli was quicker than that. I was cradled against his body while he caught me, bring his lips to the hallow of my throat, pulling at the collar of my shirt. One hand that wasn't holding me crept to the front of my body, trailing up and over my bikini top and cupping my breast.

A moan ripped through me. I was all the more startled when he snapped away, pulling me up to my full height and retracting his limbs to himself.

"Well are we going or not," he laughed leading me to the door.


End file.
